Robbie Williams reveals guilt over mental health battle
Popstar Robbie Williams has revealed how his struggles with depression and anxiety during his time with boy band Take That left him feeling guilty.
Williams was reflecting on his time with the group on the I Never Thought It Would Happen podcast when he got candid about his mental health at the time.
“I hated myself … the high bits [of my career] were married with a really, really dark depression and deep anxiety. And none of it was enjoyable,” Williams said.
Williams was at the height of his fame while with the boy band, which he was in with Gary Barlow, Howard Donald, Mark Owen, and Jason Orange from its formation in 1990 until he left in 1995.
English boy band Take That in matching tuxedos. From left to right: (back) Robbie Williams and Jason Orange, (front) Gary Barlow, Howard Donald, and Mark Owen. Image: Getty Images
After his departure, the group continued until they permanently broke up in 1996.
“The fact that none of it was enjoyable made me deeply unhappy because I’d been given the golden ticket,” he continued. “[But] this isn’t an uncommon story.”
Despite selling out arenas all over the world, Williams said he was never comfortable with his fame.
“I’d have self-hatred for me and then I’d have self-hatred for my audience for coming … the self-hatred was so heavy and intense,” he said.
Asked about the current state of his mental health, Williams said he is in a far better place.
“I don’t know if it ever leaves leaves. It’s not as extreme as it used to be,” he said.
“Actually, I don’t live there anymore. I used to live there. I might weekend there occasionally every three months, but it’s not the place that I live in now.
“It’s not driving the car. Somebody who is more content is driving the car.”
Williams credits wife Ayda Field for her calming effect on him.
The pair have been together since 2006 and share four children: Theodora, Charlton, Colette, and Beau.
If you or anyone you know needs immediate mental health support, contact Lifeline on 13 11 14 or beyondblue on 1300 224 636, or visit lifeline.org.au or beyondblue.org.au.
Image: Robbie Williams / Instagram