Andre Agassi victorious in pro pickleball debut!

Andre Agassi, former tennis demigod and proud wearer of 1990s denim shorts, just served up a win in his professional pickleball debut, the sport that sounds like a snack and plays like a caffeine-fuelled family reunion in Florida.

Fresh off turning 55 (and presumably fuelled by birthday cake and a lifetime supply of Voltarin), Agassi teamed up with 18-year-old phenom Anna Leigh Waters. Together, they defeated a duo of teens young enough to still ask permission before downloading apps. The final score: 11-8, 9-11, 11-7 – a tight match that was equal parts strategy, reflex and Agassi’s uncanny ability to intimidate opponents with his résumé.

Let’s take a moment to appreciate this image: one of tennis’s all-time greats, who once faced Pete Sampras at Wimbledon, now facing… someone who probably wasn't alive when Agassi last hoisted a Grand Slam trophy. And yet, here he is, paddle in hand, knees holding together like true American heroes, navigating a sport that’s basically what would happen if tennis and ping pong had a baby in a Florida retirement community.

Agassi, who retired from tennis in 2006 and was inducted into the Hall of Fame when flip phones still roamed the earth, has since dabbled in pickleball exhibition matches, mostly as an excuse to promote paddle gear online and to remind the world that he still has better footwork than most 25-year-olds.

Pickleball, in case you’ve been trapped under a yoga mat, is the fastest-growing sport in America, and is making huge strides here in Australia too. It’s played with paddles, a plastic wiffleball, and the unwavering confidence of people who own ergonomic lawn chairs. It now boasts over 13 million U.S. players and rising – about 12.9 million of whom are currently trying to explain the rules to their confused spouses.

Naturally, Agassi wasn’t quite sure how to feel about entering the pro scene.

"I have this conflict, like I can't tell. Is this fun? Is this anxiety?" he admitted, possibly while trying to remember if his insurance covers pickleball-related injuries. He also joked that many of his tennis peers were tuning in “to watch a slow-motion train wreck”. (Spoiler: it never crashed.)

His personal goal for the tournament wasn’t medals or glory – it was approval from his teenaged partner. “A win for me will be when this is over and Anna Leigh looks at me and says, ‘Do you want to play again?’” he said. 

While it’s too early to say whether this marks the start of a new career or just an elaborate midlife crisis with a paddle, one thing’s for sure: pickleball will never be the same.

And who knows? At this rate, Roger Federer could be lacing up orthopaedic sneakers any minute now...

Images: Instagram