Search

"Ridiculous": Debate erupts over whether grandparents should be paid to babysit

Any parent knows how difficult it is to get your child into daycare or preschool. With limited spaces across the country and rising costs, many are turning to their families for help. Many rely on grandma and grandpa to help out with the kids, and while some say they'd happily do it for free, others think it's time to put a price on it. According to a Nine.com.au poll 42 per cent of Aussies believe that grandparents should be paid for babysitting, while 58 per cent of them believe there's no need to pay grandparents for their services. However, the question is more complicated than a simple yes or no, with many explaining that it depends on the circumstance. "If grandparents are babysitting for special occasions or at their request then I don't think they should be paid. Most would do it for love and time with grandkids. If grandparents are providing child minding then that's different. If it's a regular occurrence then yes they should be paid," explained one person. "Grandparents should be paid to babysit if they are required for more than two full days a week," echoed another. "Grandparents should be paid, it is cheaper than creche and the kids won't be as sick mixing with a batch of others," a third wrote. For many there's a big difference between babysitting on a weekend or a one-off day versus during the week. "Being paid as a grandparent to babysit in my opinion is ridiculous, however if a grandparent is enlisted to provide child care more than two days a week so that parents can work, I think a payment in some form isn't unreasonable, even if it's a surprise gift intermittently," one wrote. "I babysit my grandchildren while my daughter works she pays me $20 for petrol, but if they want to go out and I babysit then she doesn't pay me which I'm OK with," added another person. The parents and grandparents' financial position was also a big factor. "I think the grandparent babysitting for payment is a personal thing. Some parents can really afford it, some are struggling and the grandparents do it to help out," one explained. Image: Shutterstock

Retirement Income

Grandma banned from babysitting after ignoring daughter's simple request

A new mum has banned her own mother from babysitting duties, after she blatantly refused to follow a few basic safety instructions. The young mum took to Reddit to share her plight, after moving back home so she could save up to buy a house, which at the time her mum "very enthusiastically agreed to". But, after a few months of living together again, the 23-year-old mum has had more things added onto her plate, as she's constantly worried about her own mum not following her instructions when it comes to her son, who was born in September. She said that her mum has been "constantly checking to see if he has teeth" or pushing them to "stop feeding him milk", or even trying to "give him really complicated food" like candy yams. And whenever she expresses her concerns, her mum nonchalantly responds with: "I did with you and you survived". It reached a peak when her mother gave her baby boy some water, which according to The World Health Organisation, children under six months should not be drinking anything else other than breast milk or formula. This is because babies stomachs are very small and their kidneys are still developing, so they are unable to process water in the same way adults do, plus it puts them at risk of water intoxication and nutrition loss. The grandmother blatantly ignored her daughter's request and gave her grandson water anyways responding with, "See, he's fine. He isn't dead." That was the young mum's breaking point and she immediately took her baby away. "She will no longer be watching the baby alone since she is constantly overstepping my boundaries and doing everything I ask her to not do," she wrote. But she said that things are complicated since they're living together and now her mother isn't speaking to her because she made her "feel like a bad parent and grandparent." The young mum questioned whether she was the bad guy in this scenario, but other Reddit users were quick to defend her for setting her boundaries. "One would hope for a *little* bit more for their kid than "not dead"," one wrote. "This is an incredibly low standard for her to be proud of maintaining", another added. Image: Getty

Family & Pets

Mum's list of chores for babysitter divides internet

An American mum and schoolteacher has divided social media after she shared a list of chores that her 17-year-old babysitter could do for extra cash. Katrina Ivan hired a former student, who is now a senior in high school, to babysit her two-year-old son. The busy mum, who had been struggling to maintain her home, left an optional list of chores the babysitter could do for some extra cash. “You are more than welcome to hang out and watch TV but if you want to earn some extra cash these are up for grabs,” the note read. She claimed that her son was already asleep when the babysitter arrived at 7:30pm and she would be looking after him until 11:30pm. The babysitter was being paid $115.45 for the four hours of work. The extra chores included organising the kitchen island, which would earn the student $15, as would cleaning the windows and mirrors in the house and sweeping and mopping the kitchen floor. Cleaning out the fridge would earn the her $23, while vacuuming the couch would earn her $4. A few other optional chores included re-organising the toys, organising the kitchen island, and re-organising the silverware, which were all chores that would earn the student $15. The babysitter earned an extra $92 for the chores she chose, and a few social media users have said that this was a great idea. “I wish they did this when I was a babysitter. Would have loved the opportunity to earn extra," one wrote. “This is a great idea!! Sometimes it’s boring to just to sit and watch TV, this makes time go by quicker and sometimes it’s things I would do to help," another said. “I think since it’s optional or not you can give whatever amounts. It’s still the babysitters choice whether to do it or not,” a third added. However a few others weren't as impressed. “Those are 1990 prices,” one social media user wrote. “$23 for the fridge that’s wild," another added. “I think if you mention it ahead of time ‘oh I left a chore list if you’re interested in any of them it’s extra cash for you!’ Because if I just arrived to this note I might be a little uncomfortable,” a third said. Images: TikTok

Family & Pets

When babysitting your grandkids is not the retirement plan

Megan Giles is a retirement designer for women. She supports and coaches women approaching retirement to successfully transition and create a lifestyle that is fulfilling, meaningful to them and lights them up each day. You’re retiring, or maybe you’re about to cut down to part-time hours and you can smell freedom in the air. You have the schedule for a pilates studio on your fridge, a list of restaurants to try, and a couple ideas for that abandoned corner of your garden. At last you have time to do all of those things you’ve always wanted to do. And then the phone rings. “Mum, now that you’re not working, it would be great if you could look after [grandchild] on a Friday…” And your heart sinks. You love your grandchild to bits, but a regular baby-sitting gig is not part of your plan. While this is the perfect scenario for many people approaching retirement, it’s important to recognise that it’s not for everyone. What happens if your family has other ideas for your life after work, e.g. caring for grandchildren, or they have assumptions about what you can and can't (or shouldn't!) do in retirement. Do you acquiesce and abandon your dreams or do you recognise the value of your time and dreams and decide to ‘just go for it’? The trouble with choosing to pursue your own path is the huge amount of guilt this can bring up, particularly for women. You feel that you should be there for your children and grandchildren. You know that your support will make their life easier as they have demanding jobs and because the cost of living and day care is expensive. Or perhaps you convince yourself that you do have the time and energy because, well, you’re not working anymore. But the risk that goes with this is that you start to feel resentful because you’re not being true to your dreams. Broaching this with adult children, however, can be a tricky thing to do. It brings up conflicting emotions including love, guilt, joy, fear and obligation and the last thing you want to do is make a loved one feel bad. In recognition of this, the following provides tips for sharing your retirement ideals with your family in a positive way: <ul> <li>Make an uninterrupted time to talk. While it might be an easy time to catch your children, try to avoid the early evening ‘witching hour’ when feeding and bathing can create mayhem</li> <li>Share your goals. Rather than assuming your family know what will be important to you, let them know what you would like to get out of retirement, particularly while you are active and have good health</li> <li>Articulate your concerns or fears. Let them know, for example, that you worry about being able to keep up with your energetic grandchild, or that you risk letting them down in the longer term when you decide to go travelling and can’t do that regular Tuesday ‘gig’</li> <li>Listen to what it is that your adult children are seeking and see if you can come up with alternate options together (it doesn’t always have to be one thing or the other)</li> <li>Let your family know that you love and care for them unconditionally. Not being able to provide regular baby-sitting duties does not mean that you love them any less</li> </ul> As the saying goes, you first have to look after yourself before you can look after others and this applies especially in retirement. However uncomfortable it may seem initially, have the conversation in order to understand and align both your and your family’s expectations, and then give yourself permission to follow your dreams in retirement! Images: Getty

Retirement Life

Babysitting grandkids can ward off Alzheimer’s

Good news for grandmothers! A new study finds grandchildren not only add joy to grandparents’ lives but that spending time with grandkids can ward off Alzheimer’s. The study, published in the journal Menopause, found post-menopausal women who spend time taking care of grandkids lower their risk of developing Alzheimer's and other cognitive disorders. However, too much time with the grandchildren – five or more days a week – wasn’t so good for grandma. Researchers for Women’s Health Ageing Project in Australia administered three different tests to assess the cognitive abilities of 186 women, ages 57 to 68. Among the group, 120 were grandmothers. The study found that grandmothers who helped with their grandchildren at least one day per week scored highest on the tests, while the women who spent five or more days a week with their grandkids scored significantly lower. Researchers found that grandmothers who helped out more often felt their own children – the parents of the grandkids – were too demanding on their time which dampened moods and impacted brain function. “The motivation of the present study was to expand on the current literature by examining the impact of grandparenting on cognitive function," the authors write in the new study. “To our knowledge, this is the first study to examine the relationship between grandparenting and cognition.” Image: Getty

Caring

Elderly couple's car vandalised while babysitting grandkids

A mother-of-three has been left "absolutely sickened" after her a neighbour vandalised the car of her elderly parents. The woman's parents, who are both in their 70s, were babysitting their grandchildren in their daughter's Sydney home when an angry neighbour wrote on the car in permanent marker. When they returned to the car, they found 'footpath' scrawled in the difficult to remove ink across the bonnet. The north shore local posted a photo of the vandalism to a local community Facebook group to appeal for more information. "My dad parked in our driveway to help my mother get closer access to the house given her abilities," she wrote. "In doing so, they were blocking the footpath but walkers could still walk around the back of the car." The woman explained that her parents had planned to move the car, but didn't get the chance as their three young grandchildren required constant supervision. The couple went to move their car at 9 am on Sunday morning when they saw the permanent marker across the bonnet of their white Toyota Camry. "I totally understand the concerns of blocking the footpath but to write with permanent marker all over their front bonnet is disgusting erratic behaviour and I'm absolutely sickened to think a person such as this lives nearby," the post read. "This is vandalism and is illegal!! I feel so sorry for this person in every way as they would have had so much hatred at the thought of walking around a car to go home and get a marker, come back and vandalise a car." "Just WOW!!! Next time be a big enough person to ring the doorbell and advise [us] directly so we can fix this in an amicable way and you can walk the straight path that you so desire. Or if you wish to remain anonymous write it on PAPER!" The post was flooded with sympathising locals, while others believed her parents should have seen it coming. "Wow I can't believe someone did this what an a**hole!!!! Your poor parents I hope they are ok and not too upset," one local wrote. In opposition, one person wrote, "Unpopular opinion, but I don't have much sympathy available for this. Don't block the footpath. Easy as." Image credits: Facebook

Legal

Shift work with Justine Tyerman

Justine Tyerman can’t wait to return to her unpaid job with two ‘bosses’ who scream at her . . . Mid-60s is rather late in life for a couple to start doing shift work but we took to it like proverbial ducks to a millpond. The job description was extremely off-putting but we accepted the challenge with great gusto and enthusiasm. It involved up to 10-hour shifts cleaning up vomit and poo, being splattered with food, saturated with water, frequently screeched at and occasionally scratched. There were also regular wrestling matches involving the application and removal of sanitary items and clothing. Other tasks included daily food preparation for finicky eaters, house cleaning, endless loads of washing, ironing and folding, shopping, sewing, pushing heavy loads up and downhill, singing, dancing, playing and counselling and companionship services. The two youngest ‘bosses’ were the most demanding – regardless of the time of day or night, they wanted their needs met... immediately. If not, they would scream at the top of their lungs until their wishes were granted. One would expect such difficult work to be well-rewarded financially but we were not paid a cent. However, we were overjoyed to provide our services, free of charge, and keen to be engaged again by the same ‘employers’... as soon as possible. As you will have no doubt guessed, the ‘work’ involved helping to care for our grandchildren, Isabel, a newborn, and Francesca aged one year. <img style="width: 500px; height: 281.25px;" src="https://oversixtydev.blob.core.windows.net/media/7840366/2-justine-and-newborn-granddaughter-isabel.jpg" alt="" data-udi="umb://media/b12bf1ba6f8844b09b1938cd719270cb" /> Justine and newborn granddaughter Isabel. The pandemic has kept us apart from our Sydney-based daughters, sons-in-law and their babies for the past year, so except for a visit at the birth of Francesca before the outbreak of Covid-19, we have not had the opportunity to practise our grandparenting skills. We weren’t even sure if Francesca would accept us, or if we were up to the task of doing 10-hour shifts with a toddler when our elder daughter returned to work after a year’s maternity leave. Nor did we have any idea how we’d cope with night shifts if our younger daughter and husband needed help with an unsettled newborn in the small hours of the morning. However, all our fears were completely groundless. Isabel slept well at night and boisterous Francesca loved us from the moment we started playing noisy hide and seek games, doing animal impersonations and singing Wiggles’ songs. She was an exceedingly cheerful and sunny-natured child until it came time to change her nappies or clothes. Then she turned into a feisty wrestler who had perfected the art of the corkscrew. It was a two-man job, one occupying her windmill hands, the other executing a lightning-fast nappy change and getting her into easy-on/off clothes. Gone were any naive ideas of dressing her in the pretty smocked outfits with many buttons I’d made for her mother. Mealtimes were quite a mission. She was a determined self-feeder which resulted in a monumental mess on the floor, herself and any well-meaning grandparent who attempted to streamline the process with a spoon. The trough-like silicone bibs from my young friend, Gisborne-born Emily Spear’s <a href="https://www.petiteeats.co.nz/collections/dinnerware">Petite Eats</a> range were a godsend, catching at least 50 percent of the food that was dropped. We were able to help with Francesca’s gradual transition to daycare, taking her for increasing time periods over a period of weeks. Being a sociable, adventurous wee soul, she adapted to the stimulating environment with great glee. In the afternoons when we collected her, she would spy us at the door and her little face would light up like sunshine. She’d wave vigorously and come toddling towards us. Talk about heart-melting! She was often tired and played-out by then so we took her for long shady walks in the pushchair until it was time for dinner, bath, stories and bed. By which time her mum or dad were home to take over. Our time with Isabel was radically different. She was such a tiny, wee bundle compared to her robust cousin. To begin with, she obligingly just slept and fed but after a couple of weeks, she ‘woke up’ and began to yell loudly and feed ravenously. She was not the easiest baby to settle, especially late in the day, but she seemed to like my over-the-shoulder burping technique and the rhythmical rocking of the pram. We went for long walks along the Bondi Beach promenade two or three times a day with Isabel in the pram or front pack. It was very therapeutic to get out of the house and into the fresh air when she was fractious. <img style="width: 500px; height: 300.78125px;" src="https://oversixtydev.blob.core.windows.net/media/7840350/1-justine-and-chris-pushing-granddaughter-isabel-in-her-pram-at-bondi-beach.png" alt="" data-udi="umb://media/f88f2737d14745b4b897b10439bea6e6" /> Justine and Chris pushing granddaughter Isabel in her pram at Bondi Beach. I found myself gazing at her as she slept, marvelling afresh at the miracle of new life. In the time we were there, she changed from being a sleepy newborn still curled up in a foetal position, to being a lively, alert little human being, kicking vigorously, stretching her little limbs, exercising her healthy lungs and experimenting with a wide range of quizzical facial expressions. The new parents, in their sleep-deprived state, were so appreciative of our help with meals, housework and shopping, and our daughter also welcomed her mum’s companionship and advice during the long hours of breastfeeding. Being able to support them through this momentous, life-changing time brought us closer than ever. It was such a privilege to watch them discover the joys (and trials) of parenthood that no one can really prepare you for. None of this would have been possible without laying the groundwork in advance. Well before we left home, we organised two key components — independent accommodation and transport. Our daughters live in small apartments about 10 minutes’ drive away from each other but now they both have babies, there’s no spare room for guests. Ideally, we wanted to find our own place midway between the two. I knew the cost of a hotel or holiday rental for an extended period over summer in Sydney would be prohibitive so I resorted to my favourite accommodation site, <a href="https://www.lovehomeswap.com/homes">Love Home Swap.</a> I’ve been a member of this international home swap club for over 10 years and during that time, we’ve stayed in some wonderful private homes all around the world – Santorini, the Swiss Alps, Paris, London, Piha, Wanaka... You pay a membership fee (see footnote below) and then stay free, absolutely free. I searched for properties available in the Edgecliff-Bondi area, sent out a few messages and within hours, I had a positive response from a couple who live near Bondi Beach. We arranged a points swap which meant home-owners David and Imy were not locked in to a simultaneous swap with us with but could use the points or credits to stay in the home of any Love Home Swap member, anywhere, any time. Their scope is mainly limited to Australia at present due to COVID-19 but as soon as border restrictions ease, they will have the choice of thousands of homes in hundreds of countries all around the world. <img style="width: 374.8782862706914px; height: 500px;" src="https://oversixtydev.blob.core.windows.net/media/7840351/3-chris-cooking-dinner-in-the-well-equipped-kitchen-at-david-and-imys-apartment.png" alt="" data-udi="umb://media/3ac892bf7df744ed965492930cb49f92" /> Chris cooking dinner in the well-equipped kitchen at David and Imy's apartment. David and Imy’s compact two-bedroom, two-bathroom, open-plan apartment worked incredibly well for us. Located on the top floor of a three-storey building in a great neighbourhood with excellent cafes, restaurants, seafood, bakery and fruit shops nearby, the apartment was absolutely immaculate, and equipped with high-quality appliances and everything we needed. Above all, it provided a quiet, tranquil haven for us to escape to at the end of a busy day with the little ones. We enjoyed many a relaxed glass of wine or beer on the balcony overlooking the rugged coastline on the famous Bondi to Coogee walkway, a great track for an early morning or evening run or walk. <img style="width: 500px; height: 300.78125px;" src="https://oversixtydev.blob.core.windows.net/media/7840352/5-sunset-from-the-balcony-of-david-and-imys-love-home-swap-apartment-near-bondi-beach.png" alt="" data-udi="umb://media/46c9f67f3cf94ced9e52970fad53c717" /> Sunset from the balcony of David and Imy's Love Home Swap apartment near Bondi Beach. Having independent accommodation also allowed our daughters and sons-in-law to have their own space, privacy and time to be together as a family. We met David and Imy before they headed off on a road trip in New South Wales. They left an impressive 40-page guide to the apartment covering everything from security and access to neighbourhood shopping, dining and recreation - the most comprehensive compendium I’ve ever seen. They also left us some superb local wines to sample which was a lovely hospitable touch. Having a secure covered carpark under the apartment building was another huge plus as parking can be a major problem around Bondi... which brings me to my next key component: securing our own means of transport so we were not dependent on family members. We organised a <a href="https://www.jucy.com/au/en/cars/">JUCY Rentals</a> vehicle before we left home which turned out to be absolutely indispensable. JUCY provides an excellent pick-up/drop-off service at Sydney Airport which was very convenient. Our zippy Toyota Corolla hatchback did umpteen trips to the supermarket, delivered supplies and home-cooked meals to three households, and transported our elder granddaughter to and from daycare in the secure, back-facing car seat that JUCY fitted for us. The vehicle was big enough to accommodate the pushchair and other toddler paraphernalia for trips to the beach and playground but small enough to squeeze into tight parking spaces. Having our own wheels literally enabled us to be in two places as once – one with Isabel and the other with Francesca. We would often swap shifts in the middle of the day to make sure we saw both grandchildren every day. <img style="width: 374.8782862706914px; height: 500px;" src="https://oversixtydev.blob.core.windows.net/media/7840353/8-our-zippy-jucy-hatch-back-was-indispensable.png" alt="" data-udi="umb://media/ea017fe08a2e4a5aa026040fd34cc26a" /> Our zippy JUCY hatch-back was indispensable. After six weeks, we said a tearful farewell and reluctantly returned to New Zealand to enter our compulsory two-week managed isolation period. We spent 14 days in a standard hotel room at The Grand Millennium in Auckland under the ever-watchful eyes of defence force, police and security personnel. We had great plans to do Pilates and yoga together but the room was so small only one of us could exercise at a time. We were comfortable, well-fed, thoroughly Covid-tested and kept safe from infection but two weeks in a room with windows that did not open and just 30 minutes of fresh air and sunshine a day was challenging to say the least. However, it was worth every minute for the joy and fulfilment we discovered as grandparents. It’s given new purpose and meaning in our lives. I just can’t wait to go back to shift work in Sydney. Factbox: <ul> <li>In preparation for the time when we can again travel freely, check out thousands of <a href="https://www.lovehomeswap.com/homes">Love Home Swap</a> properties all around the world.</li> <li>There is a two-week free trial and then you choose from one of three membership tiers starting at around $NZ20/$AUS18 a month.</li> <li>Have a look-see at what’s available in <a href="https://www.lovehomeswap.com/homes/newzealand">New Zealand, </a><a href="https://www.lovehomeswap.com/homes/Australia">Australia</a> and the <a href="https://www.lovehomeswap.com/homes/Australia"></a><a href="https://www.lovehomeswap.com/homes/cook-islands">Cook Islands</a>.</li> <li>Rent a car or campervan from <a href="https://www.jucy.com/au/en">JUCY Rentals</a> who have been providing reliable and budget-friendly rentals in Australia for over 11 years.</li> </ul>

Domestic Travel

Mother posts “delusional” list of babysitter requirements

An anonymous mother has posted on Facebook looking for a babysitter for her three children. Although that might seem harmless on its own, the list of requirements was what had people confused. Some requirements included being a Trump fan to at least having nine years of experience working with children, according to the screenshot on <a rel="noopener" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/ChoosingBeggars/comments/a2664j/delusional_babysitter_requirements/" target="_blank">Reddit</a>. Although political preferences aren’t usually asked while looking for a babysitter, many were optimistic until they read further on for the unknown mother’s demands. According to her, candidates must have full availability, including weekends, and must show up for “emergency last-minute calls”. You also are required to have “perfect attendance”, as 100 per cent is required. It also helps if you’re a native English speaker but know a second language so you can teach her children while you’re looking after them. The best part for many was the price, as the mother was offering $10/hr in cash. According to her, “it’s like making $15/hr normally but without paying tax”. <img style="width: 281.1094452773614px; height:500px;" src="https://oversixtydev.blob.core.windows.net/media/7832907/6jfd7f801q121-1.jpg" alt="" data-udi="umb://media/ea3bc3e8e8db4b2cbcc163cd50792ffb" /> Others were quick to comment, saying that they’d be worried about a babysitter with nine years of experience working for $10 an hour. “Would be worried about someone who had the degree and/or experience but was still willing to graft for $10 an hour,” they wrote. Another said that it was unfair that the babysitter would have to pay for snacks. “I thought she meant SHE'D be willing to pay for the babysitters snacks. I was like well I guess that's nice, then I realized she meant the babysitters would be paying for snacks. Lovely,” they said. One shared what their babysitting experience would be like if they were paid $10/hour. “For $10/hr I will come over to watch your TV and eat your snacks. Expect to return to alive children.... that's it.”

Home & Garden

Babysitting boundaries for ‘Granny Nannies’

You are the kind of parent who, in order to help your adult children, get ahead in life and pay off a large mortgage, are chipping in to babysit grandchildren to ease the burden of childcare costs. The amount of caring you are doing may vary from a few hours a week to multiple days per week. In doing so you are also contributing significantly to the nation’s coffers. Research shows that $5.54 billion is added to the Australian economy by unpaid carers and $1.26 billion from unpaid childcare provided by the over 50s. It is a very natural, altruistic and noble intention to want to help your children in this way and research published in May this year by the University of Melbourne revealed that it can be good for you. The study found postmenopausal women who took care of their grandchildren one day a week had better memory and faster cognitive speed than those who didn’t. Balancing yours and your children’s needs The researchers however carry a warning about over-using the generous nature of grandparents noting that women who cared for grandchildren five or more days a week had significantly slower processing speed and planning scores, possibly because they felt exhausted and stressed. National Seniors CEO, Michael O’Neill says it’s important for grandparents to aim for a balance in enjoying their retirement years and providing support to their children. “It’s about balance and not giving up on your dreams, expectations and goals to achieve. Those goals shouldn’t be subsumed by the demands of a younger generation". However, the economic reality is that there is an increasing reliance on grandparents for childcare assistance in dual income families and so here are some good ideas for negotiating the babysitting/caring parameters successfully: Tips for setting babysitting boundaries Set limits early on – you might even like to start the conversation with your adult child before your grandchild is born <ul> <li>Consider how far in advance of sitting time you'd like to be approached. If you prefer a week’s notice and not same-day requests </li> <li>Let your children know in advance if you are okay with taking grandchildren to doctor’s appointments or something similar.</li> <li>Let your children know if you are comfortable with supervising homework/study.</li> <li>Set time parameters around drop-off and pick-up </li> <li>School holiday arrangements need to be set early and be clear about school holiday activities i.e. signing grandkids up to camps/classes etc.</li> <li>Will you have grandchildren for sleepovers or not?</li> <li>Will playdates need to be arranged?</li> </ul> More ideas for stress-free babysitting <ul> <li>If you have a skill or hobby that you are talented at share this with your grandkids where appropriate</li> <li>Decide if and/or how you will deliver discipline. You are not obligated to share this role, but it will help your child and grandchild if you have a plan in place</li> <li>Let your household standards slip a bit and put away the precious ornaments while grandkids are around, as this can save heartache for them and you</li> <li>Discuss food and nutrition issues with your child as they may have strong views on this</li> <li>Discuss sleep pattern and arrangements i.e. will the grandchild be required to nap during the day or not</li> <li>Discuss appropriateness of certain movies, books and video games with your child ahead of the sitting/caring time</li> <li>The key thing to remember is to have open, honest communication about babysitting with your children early to avoid unrealistic expectations. You shouldn’t have to do anything you are uncomfortable with so you should try not to be a ‘yes’ man or woman to your children all the time, or your generosity could be taken for granted and lead to stress for both you and your children.</li> </ul> What are some of your tips? Let us know in the comments below. Written by Danielle Cesta. Republished with permission of <a href="https://www.wyza.com.au/articles/lifestyle/wyza-life/the-granny-nanny-trend.aspx">Wyza.com.au. </a>

Caring

Grandparents who babysit live longer than those who don’t

<a href="http://www.ehbonline.org/article/S1090-5138(16)30072-1/abstract">A study</a> has found that older people who provide care for others on a semi-regular basis will likely live longer than those who don’t. Researchers from the University of Western Australia partnered with others from the University of Basel, Edith Cowan University, the Humboldt University of Berlin, and the Max Planck Institute for Human Development in Berlin to look at the survival rates of grandparents who cared for their grandchildren. Using data from the <a href="https://www.base-berlin.mpg.de/en">Berlin Aging Study</a> collected between 1990 and 2009, the international team analysed over 500 people aged between 70 and 103. Their research showed that grandparents who care for their grandchildren live longer on average than those grandparents who don’t. Unlike with similar studies in the past, this one did not include those grandparents who were the primary caregivers, instead focusing on grandparents who provided occasional childcare. Those who don’t have grandchildren will be interested to know that the study also took into account adults who did not have children or grandchildren, but who provided care for others within their social network. The results showed that half of the grandparents who provided care were still alive ten years after their initial interview – regardless of whether this care was given to grandchildren, or by helping out with housework for adult children. Of those who did not provide care for others, about half had died within the first five years of the study. Those who didn’t have children, but who helped others within their social network typically lived another seven years after the study began, while those who didn’t provide support to others lived only another four years on average. Helping others too much can, however, be detrimental to one’s own health. <a href="https://www.mpib-berlin.mpg.de/en/media/2016/12/helping-pays-off-people-who-care-for-others-live-longer">Ralph Hertwig</a>, Director of the Center for Adaptive Rationality at the Max Planck Institute for Human Development cautioned, “previous studies have shown that more intense involvement causes stress, which has negative effects on physical and mental health.” The results are thought to point to prosocial behaviour having its roots in the family. Sonja Hilbrand from the Department of Psychology at the University of Basel stated, “It seems plausible that the development of parents’ and grandparents’ prosocial behaviour toward their kin left its imprint on the human body in terms of a neural and hormonal system”. Hilbrand goes on to explain that this system is potentially responsible for the evolution of “cooperation and altruistic behaviour towards non-kin”. Do you look after your grandchildren? And if you don’t have any grandies, do you support others in your community? Related links: <a href="http://www.oversixty.co.nz/lifestyle/family-pets/2017/01/superstar-grandmas-picture-book-defying-old-stereotypes/">“Superstar Grandmas” children’s book defying old stereotypes</a> <a href="http://www.oversixty.co.nz/lifestyle/family-pets/2017/01/the-new-grandparenting-handbook/">The new grandparenting handbook</a> <a href="http://www.oversixty.co.nz/lifestyle/family-pets/2017/01/grandfather-learns-to-draw-to-connect-with-grandchildren/">Grandfather learns to draw to connect with grandchildren</a>

Family & Pets

Grandmas who babysit less likely to develop Alzheimer’s

New research shows that babysitting your grandchildren can help you stay mentally sharp. The study, published in a 2014 edition of Menopause, the journal of the North American Menopause Society, showed that grandmothers who helped out with childcare duties at least one day per week scored better in cognitive tests, which could be a sign of a lower risk of developing dementia and Alzheimer's disease. Interestingly, it’s all about a good balance as too much babysitting can backfire. The study showed that grandmothers who helped out five or more times per week scored lower in the tests. Striking a good balance is beneficial for everyone, with research from Oxford University and the Institute of Education in London showing that children are generally happier if grandparents are involved in their upbringing. Grandparents often have more time than working parents to provide support, advice and problem solving for children, especially those working in a part-time carer capacity. How often do you look after your grandchildren? Let us know in the comments below. Related links: <a href="http://www.oversixty.co.nz/lifestyle/family-pets/2016/05/how-to-say-no-to-babysitting-grandkids/">How to say no when you’re unable to babysit grandkids</a> <a href="http://www.oversixty.co.nz/lifestyle/family-pets/2016/04/important-things-to-let-little-children-do/">7 important things little children should be allowed to do</a> <a href="http://www.oversixty.co.nz/lifestyle/family-pets/2016/04/what-i-hate-about-being-a-grandparent-today/">Grandparenting in the 21st century</a>

News

Artist shares “naughty” images from babysitting day

Photographer and artist, Fern Smooch, recently babysat his friend’s kids under one condition: She got to bring her camera.“My friend told me that since they had kids they don’t have any time to even go to the movies or do anything anymore, so here I come to save the day!” said the photographer.“Babysitting 101: don’t hire a friend that holds a camera.”The result was some hilariously “naughty” photos. And don’t worry, although the photos look dangerous, the kids were never at any risk. Fern took multiple photos and Photoshopped them together. He also held the children during the dangerous-looking shots, using a tripod and timer to capture the photos, and then Photoshopping himself out of the pictures.<img width="541" height="360" src="http://static.boredpanda.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2015/11/i-agreed-to-babysit-my-friends-babies-for-a-day-under-one-condition-i-get-to-bring-a-camera__880.jpg"><img width="541" height="360" src="http://static.boredpanda.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2015/11/i-agreed-to-babysit-my-friends-babies-for-a-day-under-one-condition-i-get-to-bring-a-camera-3__880.jpg"><img width="539" height="340" src="http://static.boredpanda.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2015/11/i-agreed-to-babysit-my-friends-babies-for-a-day-under-one-condition-i-get-to-bring-a-camera-4__880.jpg"><img width="539" height="359" src="http://static.boredpanda.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2015/11/i-agreed-to-babysit-my-friends-babies-for-a-day-under-one-condition-i-get-to-bring-a-camera-5__880.jpg">

Family & Pets

Artist shares “naughty” images from babysitting day

Family & Pets

Our Partners

Over 60

News

Shop

Catalogues

Contests

Entertainment

Travel

Health

Lifestyle

Finance

Property

Games

Information

Keep up to date

Search

"Ridiculous": Debate erupts over whether grandparents should be paid to babysit

Grandma banned from babysitting after ignoring daughter's simple request

Mum's list of chores for babysitter divides internet

When babysitting your grandkids is not the retirement plan

Babysitting grandkids can ward off Alzheimer’s

Elderly couple's car vandalised while babysitting grandkids

Shift work with Justine Tyerman

Mother posts “delusional” list of babysitter requirements

Babysitting boundaries for ‘Granny Nannies’

Grandparents who babysit live longer than those who don’t

Grandmas who babysit less likely to develop Alzheimer’s

Artist shares “naughty” images from babysitting day

Artist shares “naughty” images from babysitting day

Our Partners