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Australian Word of the Year announced

Cost-of-living pressures and anger at the nation-wide supermarket duopoly have influenced the Australian Word of the Year for 2024. The Australian National Dictionary Centre, based at the Australian National University, has chosen "Colesworth": a blended word referencing the country's largest supermarket chains, Coles and Woolworths. Senior Researcher Mark Gwynn said the word is almost exclusively used in negative contexts, with many calling out the power held by both supermarket giants. Although the word itself has been circulated for several years, its use has skyrocketed over the past 12 months, according to Gwynn. "Aussies walk out of the supermarket with less after paying more, but then hear news of massive profits in the supermarket sector. And with official investigations into some of the pricing practices at Australia's two largest supermarkets, it's no wonder that ordinary shoppers have become cynical," he said. "The blend of the supermarket names Coles and Woolworths into Colesworth provides a succinct way of referring to both supermarkets while at the same time hinting at the negative aspects of what is perceived as an unfair duopoly." Other shortlisted words include a mix of terms referencing politics, tax, and climate change. "Breaking" also made the shortlist, following the iconic performance by Australian artist RayGun at the Paris Olympic Games, with words included "climate trigger," "ute tax," and "YIMBY" (Yes In My Backyard). Image credits: Shutterstock

Books

Hospice nurse reveals people's last words before they die

A hospice nurse has revealed the number one thing people say in their final moments before they die. Healthcare expert Julie McFadden, who makes online videos discussing death to help break the taboo around dying, has shared the three most common regrets patients share on their death beds. Speaking to NHS surgeon Dr Karan Rajan on his podcast, Julie said these final discussions tend to centre around what they've taken for granted. "The first one I hear all the time is that they regret not appreciating their health while they had it," Ms McFadden said, reflecting on her 15 years of working in the health sector. "That's the number one thing people say to me, I wish I would have understood how amazing it is to have a working body." The second regret she often hears is people admitting they "worked too much" and wish they hadn't worked their life away, and rather spent time doing things that brought them joy. Finally, she revealed in the clip shared to Instagram, that many dying patients have regrets about relationships. The nurse explained people either wish they had maintained certain relationships and friendships, or regret holding grudges. Dr Rajan responded to Ms McFadden's insight with a story of a young patient that made him realise we are not 'immortal' and we should not take our life "for granted". In the clip shared with his 1.5million followers he said, "A few years ago when I saw a young woman come in with pancreatitis in her 20s, within three hours this young woman is in the intensive care unit, she's intubated, ventilated, and the next day, she had passed away." "That just made me think wow, I'm in my 30s now, I'm 34, life can just go in a flash. So yes, truly don't take it for granted, we sometimes have this tendency to walk around like we're immortal." Image credits: YouTube

Caring

Having the ‘right’ friends may hold the secret to building wealth, according to new study on socioeconomic ties

<div class="theconversation-article-body"><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/brad-cannon-2216202">Brad Cannon</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/binghamton-university-state-university-of-new-york-2252">Binghamton University, State University of New York</a> Having wealthy people in your social network significantly boosts the likelihood that you’ll participate in stock markets and savings plans, according to a new working paper I co-authored. My colleagues and I <a href="https://www.nber.org/system/files/working_papers/w32186/w32186.pdf">recently conducted research</a> on social finance to understand the ways in which social networks affect stock market participation and savings behavior. This is important because a substantial fraction of households in the U.S., particularly <a href="https://www.axios.com/2023/10/18/percentage-americans-own-stock-market-investing">lower-income families, do not own stocks</a>. Given that the total return to the U.S. stock market from 1980 through September 2024 has been over 12,000% – for example, US$1,000 <a href="https://ofdollarsanddata.com/sp500-calculator/">invested in the S&P 500</a> in 1980 would be worth $121,350 today – this creates a disparity in wealth for those who participate relative to those who do not. Understanding why some people invest and others don’t is important for addressing social concerns such as rising inequality. In our study, we looked at <a href="https://academic.oup.com/ej/advance-article/doi/10.1093/ej/ueae074/7720537">social capital</a>, which is a measure of the value that comes from being in a group or having dense social networks. Researchers have found that social capital can have positive impacts on individuals and communities, spurring innovation, <a href="https://www.nature.com/articles/s41586-022-04996-4">economic prosperity</a> and better health outcomes. We used friendship data from Facebook to measure different aspects of social networks by county in the U.S. We combined this data with tax information from the Internal Revenue Service about investments and savings. We found that in counties where friendships with prosperous individuals are more common, investment and savings tend to be higher. Moreover, we found that having these friendships with wealthy individuals plays a more important role in shaping financial behaviors than two other aspects of social capital we looked at in our study: having a tight group of friends and living in a community with strong civic engagement. Of course, making wealthy friends alone does not guarantee you’ll invest or save more. But perhaps knowing people who invest makes it less daunting and fraught, particularly if those friends can serve as a resource and sounding board. “Friends with Benefits: Social Capital and Household Financial Behavior” was co-authored by <a href="https://www.marshall.usc.edu/personnel/david-hirshleifer">David Hirshleifer</a> and <a href="https://hankamer.baylor.edu/person/joshua-thornton">Joshua Thornton</a>.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/239370/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/brad-cannon-2216202">Brad Cannon</a>, Assistant Professor of Finance, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/binghamton-university-state-university-of-new-york-2252">Binghamton University, State University of New York</a> Image credits: Shutterstock This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/having-the-right-friends-may-hold-the-secret-to-building-wealth-according-to-new-study-on-socioeconomic-ties-239370">original article</a>. </div>

Money & Banking

Deborra-Lee Furness' friend makes bombshell claim

A friend of Hugh Jackman’s ex-wife, Deborra-Lee Furness, has claimed that rumours of the actor's affair with co-star Sutton Foster are true. British actress and photographer Amanda de Cadenet hinted that the rumours were true in the comments section of an Instagram video that alleged Hugh Jackman left his wife for Foster, after the two fell in love while starring together in The Music Man on Broadway. “You are on point with this one,” de Cadenet claimed in response. “My beloved friend Deb is about to have her glow up any moment FYI !” Page Six reportedly reached out to reps for Jackman, Foster and Furness for comment. Jackman and Furness announced their separation after 27 years of marriage in September 2023. They share two adopted children together. At the time, a source told the publication that the Wolverine actor was "devastated" by the split. In October, another source told Page Six that Foster and Jackman are "in love" but keeping their romance under wraps. Another source previously told news.co,.au they are “100 percent together and are in love and want to spend the rest of their lives together.” Image: Instagram

Relationships

Your friend has been diagnosed with cancer. Here are 6 things you can do to support them

<div class="theconversation-article-body"> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/stephanie-cowdery-2217734">Stephanie Cowdery</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/deakin-university-757">Deakin University</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/anna-ugalde-2232654">Anna Ugalde</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/deakin-university-757">Deakin University</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/trish-livingston-163686">Trish Livingston</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/deakin-university-757">Deakin University</a>, and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/victoria-white-1888110">Victoria White</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/deakin-university-757">Deakin University</a> Across the world, <a href="https://www.who.int/news/item/01-02-2024-global-cancer-burden-growing--amidst-mounting-need-for-services">one in five</a> people are diagnosed with cancer during their lifetime. By age 85, almost <a href="https://www.cancer.org.au/cancer-information/what-is-cancer/facts-and-figures">one in two</a> Australians will be diagnosed with cancer. When it happens to someone you care about, it can be hard to know what to say or how to help them. But providing the right support to a friend can make all the difference as they face the emotional and physical challenges of a new diagnosis and treatment. Here are six ways to offer meaningful support to a friend who has been diagnosed with cancer. <h2>1. Recognise and respond to emotions</h2> When facing a cancer diagnosis and treatment, it’s normal to experience a range of <a href="https://www.canceraustralia.gov.au/impacted-by-cancer/emotions#:%7E:text=It's%20likely%20that%20feelings%20will,these%20feelings%20ease%20with%20time">emotions</a> including fear, anger, grief and sadness. Your friend’s moods may fluctuate. It is also common for feelings to <a href="https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s00520-014-2492-9">change over time</a>, for example your friend’s anxiety may decrease, but they may feel more depressed. Some friends may want to share details while others will prefer privacy. Always ask permission to raise sensitive topics (such as changes in physical appearance or their thoughts regarding fears and anxiety) and don’t make assumptions. It’s OK to tell them you feel awkward, as this acknowledges the challenging situation they are facing. When they feel comfortable to talk, follow their lead. Your support and willingness <a href="https://www.cancervic.org.au/get-support/stories/what-to-say-and-not-say.html">to listen without judgement</a> can provide great comfort. You don’t have to have the answers. Simply acknowledging what has been said, providing your full attention and being present for them will be a great help. <h2>2. Understand their diagnosis and treatment</h2> <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1002/pon.4722">Understanding</a> your friend’s diagnosis and what they’ll go through when being <a href="https://www.cancer.org/cancer/caregivers/what-a-caregiver-does/treatment-timeline.html">treated</a> may be helpful. Being informed can reduce your own worry. It may also help you to listen better and reduce the amount of explaining your friend has to do, especially when they’re tired or overwhelmed. Explore reputable sources such as the <a href="https://www.cancer.org.au/">Cancer Council website</a> for accurate information, so you can have meaningful conversations. But keep in mind your friend has a trusted medical team to offer personalised and accurate advice. <h2>3. Check in regularly</h2> Cancer treatment can be isolating, so regular check-ins, texts, calls or visits can help your friend feel less alone. Having a normal conversation and sharing a joke can be very welcome. But everyone copes with cancer differently. Be patient and flexible in your support – some days will be harder for them than others. Remembering key dates – such as the next round of chemotherapy – can help your friend feel supported. Celebrating milestones, including the end of treatment or anniversary dates, may boost morale and remind your friend of positive moments in their cancer journey. Always ask if it’s a good time to visit, as your friend’s immune system <a href="https://www.cancerresearchuk.org/about-cancer/what-is-cancer/body-systems-and-cancer/the-immune-system-and-cancer#:%7E:text=to%20fight%20cancer-,Cancer%20and%20treatments%20may%20weaken%20immunity,high%20dose%20of%20steroids">may be compromised</a> by their cancer or treatments such as chemotherapy or radiotherapy. If you’re feeling unwell, it’s best to postpone visits – but they may still appreciate a call or text. <h2>4. Offer practical support</h2> Sometimes the best way to show your care is through practical support. There may be different ways to offer help, and what your friend needs might change at the beginning, during and after treatment. For example, you could offer to pick up prescriptions, drive them to appointments so they have transport and company to debrief, or wait with them at appointments. Meals will always be welcome. However it’s important to remember cancer and its treatments may <a href="https://www.cancer.gov/about-cancer/treatment/side-effects/nutrition#effects-of-cancer-treatment-on-nutrition">affect</a> taste, smell and appetite, as well as your friend’s ability to eat enough or absorb nutrients. You may want to check first if there are particular foods they like. <a href="https://www.cancervic.org.au/downloads/resources/booklets/nutrition-cancer.pdf">Good nutrition</a> can help boost their strength while dealing with the side effects of treatment. There may also be family responsibilities you can help with, for example, babysitting kids, grocery shopping or taking care of pets. <h2>5. Explore supports together</h2> Studies <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/35834503/">have shown</a> mindfulness practices can be an effective way for people to manage anxiety associated with a cancer diagnosis and its treatment. If this is something your friend is interested in, it may be enjoyable to explore classes (either online or in-person) together. You may also be able to help your friend connect with organisations that provide emotional and practical help, such as the Cancer Council’s <a href="https://www.cancer.org.au/support-and-services/cancer-council-13-11-20">support line</a>, which offers free, confidential information and support for anyone affected by cancer, including family, friends and carers. <a href="https://www.researchgate.net/publication/5659099_Systematic_review_of_peer-support_programs_for_people_with_cancer">Peer support groups</a> can also reduce your friend’s feelings of isolation and foster shared understanding and empathy with people who’ve gone through a similar experience. GPs <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/34333571/">can help</a> with referrals to support programs. <h2>6. Stick with them</h2> Be committed. Many people feel <a href="https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC11120751/">isolated</a> after their treatment. This may be because regular appointments have reduced or stopped – which can feel like losing a safety net – or because their relationships with others have changed. Your friend may also experience emotions such as worry, lack of confidence and uncertainty as they adjust to a <a href="https://www.cancer.gov/about-cancer/coping/survivorship/new-normal">new way of living</a> after their treatment has ended. This will be an important time to support your friend. But don’t forget: looking after <a href="https://www.healthdirect.gov.au/caring-for-someone-with-cancer">yourself</a> is important too. Making sure you eat well, sleep, exercise and have emotional support will help steady you through what may be a challenging time for you, as well as the friend you love. <a href="https://www.deakin.edu.au/faculty-of-health/research/cancer-carer-hub">Our research</a> team is developing new programs and resources to support carers of people who live with cancer. While it can be a challenging experience, it can also be immensely rewarding, and your small acts of kindness can make a big difference.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/239844/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/stephanie-cowdery-2217734">Stephanie Cowdery</a>, Research Fellow, Carer Hub: A Centre of Excellence in Cancer Carer Research, Translation and Impact, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/deakin-university-757">Deakin University</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/anna-ugalde-2232654">Anna Ugalde</a>, Associate Professor & Victorian Cancer Agency Fellow, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/deakin-university-757">Deakin University</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/trish-livingston-163686">Trish Livingston</a>, Distinguished Professor & Director of Special Projects, Faculty of Health, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/deakin-university-757">Deakin University</a>, and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/victoria-white-1888110">Victoria White</a>, Professor of Pyscho-Oncology, School of Psychology, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/deakin-university-757">Deakin University</a> Image credits: Shutterstock This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/your-friend-has-been-diagnosed-with-cancer-here-are-6-things-you-can-do-to-support-them-239844">original article</a>. </div>

Caring

Readers response: What celebrity do you think would make a great friend, and why?

When it comes to celebrities, everyone has their favourites, their crushes, and those they'd rather steer clear of. We asked our readers what celebrity they think they would be good friends with, and the response was overwhelming. Here's what they said. Judy Yannopoulos - Keanu Reeves. A true honest person with a good heart. Jenny Maclean - Steven Fry. He’s honest and kind and so very intelligent. Jeff-Lyn Bloom - Tom Hanks. He is so down to earth. Doesn’t put on airs. Jan Totti - John Farnham, because he’s down to earth and there’s no pretences. He seems just a lovely honest person. He’s an amazing Australian singer. Caz McDougall - Michael Sheen and David Tennant. Karen Maberly - Judi Dench. Seems like a good communicator, sharp mind and full of fun, and not full of herself!! Cheryl Cunningham - Denzel Washington. Totally honest and decent human. Rhonda Moffitt - Maggie Beer. She treasures family & others. Always smiling, Maggie I think would be great company. Lisa Drury Hudson - Audrey Hepburn, for her compassion, strength, fighting for children's rights and empathy. What a loss. Bob Wilkinson - Hugh Jackson and Chris Hemsworth as they both seem like down to earth nice people. Image credits: Shutterstock

Relationships

Longtime friend opens up on John Farnham's potential return to singing

John Farnham is back in the spotlight following the release of his brand new memoir, John Farnham: The Voice Inside. The memoir explores the legendary singer's extraordinary almost six-decade career, with an insight into the star's notoriously private family life. As he slowly and steadily recovers from mouth cancer, the beloved singer's voice has been heard for the first time as he narrates the <a href="https://oversixty.com.au/health/caring/john-farnham-s-voice-heard-for-the-first-time-since-throat-surgery" target="_blank" rel="noopener">audiobook</a> for his memoir. Now, long-time friend Gaynor Wheatley has shared an exciting update on whether the music icon would ever perform again. "As soon as I saw him in the studio doing the audiobook and as soon as he got behind the microphone, the twinkle was in the eye," she told Today. "That's when I thought, you know, we're still in with a shot and he can still sing, his voice box is still great, there's just a few more things to do with the mouth recovery, but we all know he's as strong as a boxer so if he wants to do something, he'll do it. "If I say to him, 'You won't sing, you can't sing, what a shame', then he'll go, 'Yes I can, I'll prove you wrong'." In another interview with The Project, she recalled how the legendary singer still wants to perform despite his facial disfigurement from the surgery. “He’s a singer,” she said at the time. “I know when he got back in the studio doing the audiobook, he was like, ‘I want to get back, I want to go back’." Image: Today/ Facebook

Caring

Beloved Friends, Tootsie and Mr Mom star passes away

Teri Garr, the beloved actress known for her iconic roles in classic films such as Young Frankenstein and Tootsie and her appearances on Friends, has passed away at the age of 79. Her death, confirmed by her publicist Heidi Schaeffer, occurred on Tuesday in Los Angeles, surrounded by family and friends. Garr's passing follows a long battle with multiple sclerosis, a condition she publicly disclosed in 2002 to raise awareness about the disease and its impact on daily life. Born Terry Ann Garr in Lakewood, Ohio, in 1944, Teri grew up in a theatrical family; her father was a vaudeville performer and her mother a Rockette. This background set the stage for Garr's early career, which began as a background dancer in Elvis Presley films during the 1960s. Her breakout role came in 1974 when she starred as Inga, the charming lab assistant to Gene Wilder's character in Mel Brooks' Young Frankenstein. The film became a cornerstone of American comedy, showcasing Garr's unique blend of humour and warmth. Garr further solidified her place in cinematic history with her performance in Tootsie in 1982, where she portrayed the vulnerable actress friend of Dustin Hoffman’s character. This role earned her an Academy Award nomination for Best Supporting Actress. Critics praised her ability to balance comedy with emotional depth, with film critic Pauline Kael calling her "the funniest neurotic dizzy dame on the screen" at that time. Despite her success, Garr faced significant challenges due to her health. She was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis during the filming of Tootsie, a struggle she detailed in her memoir, Speedbumps: Flooring It Through Hollywood. In it, she described MS as a "sneaky disease," one that complicated her life and career but did not define it. “My body had a trick or two up its sleeve," she wrote. "A stumble here, a tingling finger there. I was trained as a dancer and knew better than to indulge the random aches and pains that visited now and then. Being a successful Hollywood actress may be challenging, but little did I know that the very body that had always been my calling card would betray me.” Garr became an advocate for the National Multiple Sclerosis Society, using her platform to inspire others facing similar challenges. Throughout her career, Garr appeared in over 140 film and TV projects. She was known for her roles in Mr. Mom, Close Encounters of the Third Kind, and various television shows including Friends, where she played Phoebe's birth mother. Her playful spirit and comedic timing made her a favourite among audiences and fellow actors alike. In recent years, Garr had limited her appearances due to health issues but remained an influential figure in Hollywood. Tributes have poured in from fans and colleagues alike, celebrating her legacy as a pioneer for women in comedy and an inspiration for those battling chronic illnesses. Teri Garr leaves behind a rich legacy filled with laughter and heart. She is survived by her daughter Molly O'Neil and grandson Tyryn. Her contributions to film and television will be remembered fondly by generations to come. Images: CNN \ Fox Studios

Caring

Colin Farrell completes marathon while pushing friend in wheelchair

Colin Farrell has completed the Dublin Marathon by pushing his friend in a wheelchair across the finish line. The 48-year-old actor ran the final 4 kilometres of the 42km race while pushing his friend Emma Fogarty, who lives with a rare skin condition, to the end of the race. Back home in his native Ireland, Farrell ran the marathon to raise money for DEBRA, an Irish charity supporting people who, like Fogarty, have the incurable genetic condition epidermolysis bullosa (EB) – also known as butterfly skin. Fogarty is Ireland's oldest surviving person with the condition, and after reaching a milestone of turning 40 in June, her and Farrell pledged to complete the race together. According to the PA Media news agency, Emma was born with a severe form of the condition, as she was born with no skin on her left foot and right arm and can develop very painful blisters from even the slightest touch. Farrell told PA, "I have known Emma for many years and she epitomises bravery, she is what courage and pure determination are all about." "That run was nothing compared to the pain she is forced to endure every single day, even though she doesn't show it." "It was an honour to see her waiting for me with 4km to go, each of those representing a decade of her life, and to do the final stretch together. I'll never forget it." Also speaking to PA, Fogarty said, "This was a dream come true for me and I want to thank Colin, who has been the most supportive, generous and loyal friend I could wish for." "He has always shown his compassion and empathy for people living with EB and is a true champion in my eyes. Running a marathon is never easy but once he committed to it there was no going back, he is a man of his word." Fogarty and Farrell originally set out to raise €400,000 ($660,000 AUD) for the charity but now aim to hit the million-euro mark ($1.6 million AUD), after the pair completed the marathon in just over four hours. Image credits: CNN

Caring

The science of happier dogs: 5 tips to help your canine friends live their best life

<div class="theconversation-article-body"> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/mia-cobb-15211">Mia Cobb</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/the-university-of-melbourne-722">The University of Melbourne</a> When you hear about “science focused on how dogs can live their best lives with us” it sounds like an imaginary job made up by a child. However, the field of <a href="https://www.rnz.co.nz/podcast/ourchangingworld?share=2ec8e0ad-5008-4b2d-ae2e-a288e2a77f50">animal welfare science is real</a> and influential. As our most popular animal companion and coworker, dogs are very deserving of scientific attention. In recent years we’ve learned more about <a href="https://theconversation.com/dogs-can-get-dementia-but-lots-of-walks-may-lower-the-risk-189297">how dogs are similar to people</a>, but also how they are distinctly themselves. We often think about how dogs help us – as companions, <a href="https://theconversation.com/meet-moss-the-detection-dog-helping-tassie-devils-find-love-142909">working as detectors</a>, and keeping us <a href="https://theconversation.com/is-owning-a-dog-good-for-your-health-238888">safe and healthy</a>. Dog-centric science helps us <a href="https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/veterinary-science/articles/10.3389/fvets.2021.666898/full">think about the world from a four-paw perspective</a> and apply this new knowledge so dogs can enjoy a good life. Here are five tips to keep the tails in your life wagging happily. <h2>1. Let dogs sniff</h2> Sniffing <a href="https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/animal-emotions/201902/allowing-dogs-sniff-helps-them-think-positively">makes dogs happier</a>. We tend to forget they live in a smell-based world because we’re so visual. Often taking the dog for a walk is our daily physical activity but we should remember it could be our dogs’ only time out of the home environment. Letting them have a really good sniff of that tree or post is full of satisfying information for them. It’s their nose’s equivalent of us standing at the top of a mountain and enjoying a rich, colour-soaked, sunset view. <h2>2. Give dogs agency</h2> Agency is a <a href="https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/veterinary-science/articles/10.3389/fvets.2023.1284869/full">hot topic in animal welfare science</a> right now. For people who lived through the frustration of strict lockdowns in the early years of COVID, it’s easy to remember how not being able to go where we wanted, or see who we wanted, when we wanted, impacted our mental health. We’ve now learned that <a href="https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/veterinary-science/articles/10.3389/fvets.2023.1250251/full">giving animals choice and control</a> in their lives is important for their mental wellbeing too. We can help our dogs enjoy better welfare by creating more choices and offering them control to exercise their agency. This might be installing a doggy door so they can go outside or inside when they like. It could be letting them decide which sniffy path to take through your local park. Perhaps it’s choosing which three toys to play with that day from a larger collection that gets rotated around. Maybe it’s putting an old blanket down in a new location where you’ve noticed the sun hits the floor for them to relax on. Providing choices doesn’t have to be complicated or expensive. <h2>3. Recognise all dogs are individuals</h2> People commonly ascribe certain personality traits to certain dog breeds. But just like us, dogs have their own personalities <a href="https://scitechdaily.com/food-vs-toys-scientists-reveal-what-dogs-truly-prefer/">and preferences</a>. Not all dogs are going to like the same things and a new dog we live with may be completely different to the last one. One dog might like to go to the dog park and run around with other dogs at high speed for an hour, while another dog would much rather hang out with you chewing on something in the garden. We can see as much <a href="https://www.science.org/content/article/your-dog-s-breed-doesn-t-determine-its-personality-study-suggests">behavioural variation within breeds as we do between them</a>. Being prepared to meet dogs where they are, as individuals, is important to their welfare. As well as noticing what dogs like to do as individuals, it’s important not to force dogs into situations they don’t enjoy. <a href="https://www.rspca.org.uk/adviceandwelfare/pets/dogs/behaviour/understanding">Pay attention to behaviour</a> that indicates dogs aren’t comfortable, such as looking away, licking their lips or yawning. <h2>4. Respect dogs’ choice to opt out</h2> Even in our homes, we can provide options if our dogs don’t want to share in every activity with us. Having a quiet place that dogs can retreat to is really important in enabling them to opt out if they want to. If you’re watching television loudly, it may be too much for <a href="https://www.psychologytoday.com/au/blog/canine-corner/202407/how-good-is-a-dogs-hearing-compared-to-humans">their sensitive ears</a>. Ensure a door is open to another room so they can retreat. Some dogs might feel overwhelmed when visitors come over; giving them somewhere safe and quiet to go rather than forcing an interaction will help them cope. Dogs can be terrific role models for children when teaching empathy. We can demonstrate consent by letting dogs approach us for pats and depart when they want. Like seeing exotic animals perform in circuses, dressing up dogs for our own entertainment seems to have had its day. If you asked most dogs, they don’t want to wear costumes or be part of your Halloween adventures. <h2>5. Opportunities for off-lead activity – safely.</h2> When dogs are allowed to run off-lead, they use space differently. They tend to explore more widely and go faster than they do when walking with us on-lead. This offers them important and fun physical activity to keep them fit and healthy. <figure><iframe src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/2AchEFiDwA8?wmode=transparent&start=0" width="440" height="260" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen"></iframe><figcaption>Demonstrating how dogs walk differently when on- and off-lead.</figcaption></figure> A recent exploration of <a href="https://pursuit.unimelb.edu.au/articles/we-checked-if-melbourne-really-is-a-dog-friendly-city">how liveable cities are for dogs</a> mapped all the designated areas for dogs to run off-leash. Doggy density ranged from one dog for every six people to one dog for every 30 people, depending on where you live. It also considered how access to these areas related to the annual registration fees for dogs in each government area compared, with surprising differences noted across greater Melbourne. We noted fees varied between A$37 and $84, and these didn’t relate to how many off-lead areas you could access. For dog-loving nations, such as Australia, helping our canine friends live their best life feels good. <a href="https://www.rnz.co.nz/national/programmes/afternoons/audio/2018957756/our-changing-world-the-science-behind-dog-welfare">Science that comes from a four-paw perspective</a> can help us reconsider our everyday interactions with dogs and influence positive changes so we can live well, together.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/236952/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/mia-cobb-15211">Mia Cobb</a>, Research Fellow, Animal Welfare Science Centre, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/the-university-of-melbourne-722">The University of Melbourne</a> Image credits: Shutterstock This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/the-science-of-happier-dogs-5-tips-to-help-your-canine-friends-live-their-best-life-236952">original article</a>. </div>

Family & Pets

"Absolute honour": Federer's stirring words as Nadal hangs up his racquet

Roger Federer and Novak Djokovic have led a wave of tributes after Rafael Nadal announced he would be retiring from playing professional tennis. Nadal announced the news in an emotional Instagram video, where he thanked his family, team, friends and loyal fans for their support, while announcing that the David Cup Finals in November would be his last competition. In his video, the Spanish tennis champion also thanked his "greatest rivals" for giving him fierce competition throughout his stellar career. <blockquote class="instagram-media" style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/reel/DA8EpTsg3iV/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="14"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"> </div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <div style="padding: 12.5% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;"> <div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: 8px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: auto;"> <div style="width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;"> </div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" href="https://www.instagram.com/reel/DA8EpTsg3iV/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A post shared by Rafa Nadal (@rafaelnadal)</a> </div> </blockquote> Those great rivals were the first to honour Nadal after his shock announcement, with Roger Federer sharing a photo of their pair sitting side by side, both in tears, as the Swiss great announced his own retirement two years ago. He wrote, “What a career, Rafa! I always hoped this day would never come. Thank you for the unforgettable memories and all your incredible achievements in the game we love. It’s been an absolute honour.” Novak Djokovic also shared a message for Nadal, posting a photo collage of their friendship behind the scenes. “Rafa, one post is not enough to express the respect I have for you and what you have done for our sport,” the 24-time Grand Slam title winner wrote. “You have inspired millions of children to start playing tennis and I think that’s probably the greatest achievement anyone can wish for. Your tenacity, dedication, fighting spirit is going to be taught for decades. Your legacy will live forever." “Only you know what you had to endure to become an icon of tennis and sport in general. Thank you for pushing me to the limit so many times in our rivalry.” Image credits: Daniel Irungu/EPA-EFE/Shutterstock Editorial

Retirement Life

Lost touch with someone? Reach out – your friend will likely appreciate it more than you think

<div class="theconversation-article-body"><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/peggy-liu-818769">Peggy Liu</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-pittsburgh-854">University of Pittsburgh</a> and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/lauren-min-1354136">Lauren Min</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-kansas-1588">University of Kansas</a> <h2>The big idea</h2> The next time you wonder whether to reach out to a friend, family member, classmate or other person who’s been out of touch for a long time, go ahead and do it. According to <a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/pspi0000402">our just-published research</a>, it’s likely they’ll appreciate it more than you think. In a series of 13 experiments involving over 5,900 participants, we – along with colleagues <a href="https://scholar.google.com/citations?user=0Stzf1cAAAAJ&hl=en">SoYon Rim</a> and <a href="https://scholar.google.com/citations?user=TZQefJAAAAAJ&hl=en">Kate Min</a> – wanted to investigate whether people accurately predict <a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/pspi0000402">how much their social contacts appreciate being reached out to</a>. In one experiment we conducted, college students wrote a note “to check in and say hello” to a classmate they hadn’t interacted with in a while. Then we asked them how much they thought their classmate would appreciate receiving this note. Next, we delivered these notes to their classmates and asked the recipients how much they appreciated receiving them. We found that the students who received the notes were much more appreciative of the gesture than the students who wrote them had anticipated. Other experiments varied the scenario by involving older adults as participants rather than college students, switching the written message to a small gift – such as cookies or coffee – and comparing how much the sender underestimated the appreciation that an emotionally distant contact would feel compared with a close contact. Overall they yielded the same basic finding: People tended to underestimate how much others appreciated hearing from them. What drives this underestimation? Our results suggest that it’s related to how little the people reaching out factor in the surprise felt by those being contacted. When we asked recipients what they focused on when indicating how appreciative they felt, they reported paying a lot of attention to their positive feelings of surprise, which were linked to how appreciative they felt. Comparatively, potential senders did not report focusing much on recipients’ positive feelings of surprise. It also mattered whether the two parties were already in a close relationship. People’s underestimations were even greater when their contact was a distant acquaintance because these recipients were especially surprised at being contacted. <h2>Why it matters</h2> Many people can name at least one person with whom they would like to reconnect. Taking a new job, moving to a different city, becoming a parent, or the busyness of everyday life – these are just some of the life events and circumstances that can cause people to lose touch. Then, if the desire to reconnect arises on one side, doubts may arise about whether the other person may appreciate being contacted out of the blue. When people consider taking the initiative to reach out, especially after a prolonged period of no contact, they may worry about being rejected. This worry might keep them from reaching out in the first place. Our research lessens this challenge by showing that often, these gestures will be much more appreciated than one might expect. <h2>What other research is being done</h2> Our findings fit within a growing stream of research examining the tendency to underestimate others’ appreciation of various social exchanges. For example, other researchers have found that people underestimate how much <a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/pspa0000277">others appreciate receiving compliments</a> or <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/0956797618772506">expressions of gratitude</a>. Our work adds to this area by broadening the scope of the contexts in which people underestimate how much social exchanges are appreciated. Reaching out could but need not require giving compliments or expressing gratitude – the gesture can be as simple as checking in with someone to show that one is thinking about them.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/185001/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/peggy-liu-818769">Peggy Liu</a>, Ben L. Fryrear Chair in Marketing and Associate Professor of Business Administration, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-pittsburgh-854">University of Pittsburgh</a> and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/lauren-min-1354136">Lauren Min</a>, Assistant Professor of Marketing, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-kansas-1588">University of Kansas</a> Image credits: Shutterstock This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/lost-touch-with-someone-reach-out-your-friend-will-likely-appreciate-it-more-than-you-think-185001">original article</a>. </div>

Relationships

30 years of Friends: how the US sitcom became an enduring global sensation

<div class="theconversation-article-body"><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/richard-howells-1225412">Richard Howells</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/kings-college-london-1196">King's College London</a> I have to be honest – I didn’t actually watch the first episode of the classic TV series Friends when it originally aired in the US on September 22 1994. Nor did I bother when it first turned up on British television the following spring. But the final instalment was a different matter. I was on a road trip in the US at the time and checked into a motel on the outskirts of Cincinnati, Ohio specially to catch the concluding episode (The Last One) on May 6 2004. Room service arrived in the nick of time. My burger and beer only fuelled my appetite for what was to come – and the anticipation of guessing what the final line would be. So why the big change? How did my attitude evolve from indifference in the nineties to excitedly pulling off the interstate in the noughties? The answer is key to the show’s success – and why it remains so popular today. Back in 1994, the initial premise of Friends seemed to lack promise. The plot revolved round six not especially interesting characters, and none of the cast was especially famous (at least to me). The show was set mainly in two adjacent apartments in Manhattan and a coffee bar called Central Perk to which the characters returned almost every episode and in which (in the best sitcom tradition) the best seats were always available. Crucially, not a lot actually happened. <h2>The power of the ensemble</h2> So why did it work? The first important thing is that Friends was not so much a situation comedy as a character comedy. That meant it did not need a remarkable premise or dramatic incidents to drive the show. It was an ensemble piece in which we gradually got to know the characters and the friends became our friends. The show was built around everyday storylines – crushes, romances and misunderstandings or maybe something as gently amusing as Ross overdoing the teeth whitener. Viewers began to identify with individual characters (<a href="https://www.buzzfeed.com/ljune/are-you-more-rachel-or-monica-from-friends-alfsqwp6hf">“are you a Monica or a Rachel?”</a>) or to take sides on the issues of the day. What, for example, are the relationship rules of being “on a break”? <figure><iframe src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/TIK01MpwWGg?wmode=transparent&start=0" width="440" height="260" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen"></iframe><figcaption>One episode of Friends revolves around Ross (David Schwimmer) getting his teeth whitened.</figcaption></figure> Friends was, of course, very well produced, cast and written. As it became even more successful, it survived the normally perilous inclusion of <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xHLaISBRmdI">celebrity guest stars</a> and – vitally – it never “jumped the shark” (industry-speak for growing out of its initial premise or building up to dramatic, but ultimately silly, plot gimmicks from which it is impossible to recover). Ultimately, and hearteningly, the six characters all remained friends. Beneath the professional craft and production polish of Friends, it is the concept of friendship, underscored with by the viewer’s sense of aspiration, which ultimately explains the series’ success then and now. One of the functions of popular culture is to provide a better imaginary world than the one we actually inhabit. In some ways this is simply compensation for the reality of the everyday: we dream of that which we do not have. It’s what the great Utopian sociologist Ernst Bloch called <a href="https://www.marxists.org/archive/bloch/hope/introduction.htm">“wishful images in the mirror”</a> – except that the mirror here is a television screen. The world of Monica, Rachel, Joey, Chandler, Phoebe and Ross is certainly a wishful one for many. They live in improbably nice apartments for their jobs (or lack of them), and they are defined by their personalities rather than their careers. They are good looking and well dressed, and the series centres on their ample leisure and social time. Unlike reality, arguments are always overcome and – most importantly of all – friendship always triumphs. <figure><iframe src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/pPM7VxnVViw?wmode=transparent&start=0" width="440" height="260" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen"></iframe><figcaption>The first and last scene of Friends.</figcaption></figure> What a contrast this vision provides to the actual lives of so many people today. The real world is beset with isolation, loneliness, sometimes insurmountable problems, occasionally fear and certainly drudgery. But with Friends, as the <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sLisEEwYZvw">chirpy theme song</a> reminds us, there is always someone “there for you” – if only in surrogate. Some critics today carp about the show’s <a href="https://metro.co.uk/2023/04/02/lack-of-diversity-on-friends-mocked-on-snl-after-years-of-criticism-18542168/">lack of diversity</a> and <a href="https://www.cosmopolitan.com/uk/entertainment/a38817/11-times-friends-sexist-homophobic/">outdated attitudes</a> to the cultural issues of the present day. While this may be true, like TV series, criticism also dates. And series which have long gone into reruns, repeats, streaming and syndication are virtually critic-proof in that they are recommended by word of mouth rather than increasingly ideologically centred reviews. Viewers just want it to be funny. Oh: And in case you were wondering, the final line in the whole of Friends went to the <a href="https://theconversation.com/matthew-perry-the-power-of-celebrities-speaking-publicly-about-their-addiction-216879">late Matthew Perry</a> as Chandler Bing. When Rachel suggests they all go for one last coffee, Chandler quips: “Sure. Where?” <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/richard-howells-1225412">Richard Howells</a>, Emeritus Professor of Cultural Sociology, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/kings-college-london-1196">King's College London</a> Image credits: NBC This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/30-years-of-friends-how-the-us-sitcom-became-an-enduring-global-sensation-239464">original article</a>. </div>

Family and friends farewell Sam Landsberger

Sam Landsberger's family and friends have said their final goodbyes to the beloved sports journalist. The Herald Sun AFL and cricket reporter was talking on the phone with his mum while on the way to meet a friend when he was <a href="https://www.oversixty.com.au/health/caring/he-was-at-peace-sam-landsberger-s-parents-break-silence-after-sudden-death" target="_blank" rel="noopener">hit by a truck</a> at the intersection of Bridge Rd and Church St in Richmond, Melbourne on August 20. The 35-year-old later died at The Alfred hospital from his injuries. Hundreds gathered to farewell him at a funeral service at the Temple Beth Israel synagogue in St Kilda. His parents, Jake and Anne, have remembered their youngest child and only son as a "caring and wonderful" person. “Approximately 22 years ago our family stood in this same spot in this wonderful big hall celebrating Sam’s bar mitzvah, now we find ourselves in this exact hall in utter and complete devastation,” Jake said. “I heard so many stories that parents should never ever have to bury their children, yet this is what we are doing. “He was a dedicated, hardworking journalist who loved his job. “He brought so much joy to our lives. He lit up every room he entered, yet he lit up our entire lives.” His father also said that Sam's second grade teacher called him a "diamond" and it was the perfect word to describe him. Jake also recalled his favourite story about his son when he was 10 years old. “Sam had vomited all over his front, his chest was bright yellow,” he said. “I picked him up over the fence and we walked into the rooms to check him over … (only to learn) the reason he was sick was he’d just consumed a jumbo box of Cheezels. “From that time on, every member of the club would call him Cheezels. “At this moment it’s indescribable devastation we feel but also underlining gratitude for what he gave, a beautiful, gorgeous, caring young man who will never be forgotten and always be in our hearts.” Sam’s mother, thanked Herald Sun cartoonist Mark Knight for the <a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/C-9BuSHTic-/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link&igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==" target="_blank" rel="noopener">"wonderful tribute"</a> that captured his spirit and likeness to his maternal grandfather. “I delivered Sam, I nurtured Sam and I am so grateful that I was with him at the end,” she said. “There will always be a massive hole in my heart. I love you and will forever. “Rest in peace my darling boy, I love you.” <blockquote class="instagram-media" style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" data-instgrm-captioned="" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/C-9BuSHTic-/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="14"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"> </div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <div style="padding: 12.5% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;"> <div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: 8px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: auto;"> <div style="width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;"> </div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" href="https://www.instagram.com/p/C-9BuSHTic-/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A post shared by Mark Knight (@knightcartoons)</a> </div> </blockquote> His older sister also talked about their heartbreak at losing their little brother, with a message from his niece being read out. “Dear Sam, I’m really going to miss you. I loved how you would push me on the swings...Thank you for teaching me about the Bulldogs. I’m sad I won’t get to see you again. Love Zara.” Another friend, Will Kim, revealed Sam was due to be best man at his wedding later this year. “I thought he’d be the one making a speech and saying nice things about me, not the other way around,” he said. “How cruel and unpredictable life can be.” Since news broke of Sam's death the footy community have shared their fond memories of him. “The entire AFL footy community is shocked and saddened to hear of the sudden death of Sam in a tragic road accident,” his online funeral notice stated. “His enthusiasm for the game and passion for his work was always evident and his positive approach and friendly nature will be fondly recalled by all who knew and worked with him. “Sincere sympathies to Jake, Anne, Jess, Sarah and all of his extended family, friends and colleagues.” The truck driver that struck Landsberger is due to appear before Melbourne Magistrates Court on September 19. While he underwent the standard roadside alcohol and drug tests, which were both negative, he was charged for refusing to provide a blood sample to police. He has also been given a notice banning him from driving until his first court appearance. Images: Herald Sun

Caring

Readers response: What’s the longest friendship you’ve had, and what has kept it strong?

When it comes. to friendships, it has long been said that people come into your life for a season, a reason or a lifetime. These "lifetime" relationships are often the friends we made when we were young, who have been by our side through thick and thin. We asked our readers what their longest friendships have been and what made them so strong, and the response was overwhelming. Here's what they said. Linda Cox - 72 years. We were toddlers when we met and even though we have lived on opposite sides of the planet for the last 50 years, we are still best friends. Rae Meihuizen - 62 years. We met as a school friend of my cousin. He was my best man at my wedding and still a very dear friend to this day. Jennie Harley - My friend from school in Sydney living in same street. Although we live a long way apart & haven’t actually seen each other in many years, our phone calls, although sometimes we are both very slack, the relationship is always the same. No explaining things from the past just mutual understanding and love. Marilyn Carter - 60 years. We all met doing our hairdressing apprenticeship. We love each other so much and do anything for each and every one of us. Guila Kelly - Met at age 4 in prekinder. Born 2 weeks apart, both turn 80 shortly. Never a cross word. Marjorie Smith - 82 years. Met at school in NZ when we were 10 years old. Still friends but in different countries. My friend was one of our bridesmaids in 1954. Margaret Inglis - 74 years. Our mums were next to each other in hospital when we were born. I'm a day older, but even when my parents moved, Jennie and I would spend a few days each school holidays at each other's places. In 1969 I moved to Australia (from NZ) and we STILL catch up via FB etc. Went back to NZ for a few days about 7 years ago, yep, met up again and it was like we'd never been apart. Ros Bieg - 64yrs. Unconditional friendship and sooo many memories. Margaret Woodhouse - 68 years. We met at 12 and are 80 this year. Both totally different in personality, but tolerant of the differences and respect each other’s beliefs. Live in different states in Australia but FaceTime twice a week and spend 3-4 weeks together every year. Image credits: Shutterstock

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Matthew Perry’s chilling final words revealed

Matthew Perry's chilling final words to his assistant on the day of his death has been made public for the first time, not long after five people were <a href="https://www.oversixty.com.au/finance/legal/five-people-arrested-over-matthew-perry-s-death" target="_blank" rel="noopener">arrested</a> in connection to his death. New details about the star's final weeks alive have been released in relation to the plea deal taken by Perry’s former live-in assistant, Kenneth Iwamasa, 59. The former Friends star told his assistant to “shoot me up with a big one,” before he was found dead in the hot tub of his Los Angeles mansion. According to court documents, Perry was injected with a shot of ketamine at around 8.30am, and was administered the second dose while watching a movie at 12.45pm. About 40 minutes later, he asked his assistant to prepare the jacuzzi and shoot him up with the third, and final “big one”, of the day. “Defendant left the residence to run errands... after returning to the residence, defendant found [Mr Perry] face down in the jacuzzi and deceased,” the court documents reportedly said. The newly released police documents also said that Perry had been found unconscious at his home twice before his tragic death in October. Around two weeks before his death it was reported that the doctor accused of supplying the ketamine, Dr Salvador Plascencia, injected him "with a large dose of ketamine", that caused a "significant spike" to his systolic blood pressure and caused his body to "freeze up such that he could not talk or move". Dr Plascencia allegedly told Iwamasa "Let's not do that again" following the scare and later allegedly described Perry as "too far gone and spiralling in his addiction". Despite this the doctor allegedly ordered 10 vials of ketamine for Perry four days before his death, and allegedly contacted Perry's assistant to offer the up for sale. Three other people have been arrested alongside Iwamasa and Dr Plascencia, including Eric Fleming, Dr. Mark Chavez and the so-called “Ketamine Queen of Los Angeles”, Jasveen Sangha. According to Page Six, Iwamasa, Fleming and Chavez all agreed to a deal that saw them plead guilty – while Sangha and Plasencia have pleaded not guilty. Image: Doug Krantz/BFA.com/ Shutterstock editorial

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It’s hard to reach out to old friends, but doing so may help alleviate loneliness

<div class="theconversation-article-body"> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/lara-b-aknin-1365501">Lara B Aknin</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/simon-fraser-university-1282">Simon Fraser University</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/gillian-sandstrom-1283157">Gillian Sandstrom</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sussex-1218">University of Sussex</a>, and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/kristina-castaneto-1548733">Kristina Castaneto</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/simon-fraser-university-1282">Simon Fraser University</a> Millions of <a href="https://www150.statcan.gc.ca/t1/tbl1/en/tv.action?pid=4510004801">Canadians are lonely</a>. This is worrisome because loneliness, defined by the World Health Organization as “<a href="https://www.who.int/news/item/15-11-2023-who-launches-commission-to-foster-social-connection">the social pain of not feeling connected</a>,” predicts both lower mental and physical health. Research shows that lacking a sense of social connection can pose an <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/1745691614568352">equivalent health risk to smoking 15 cigarettes per day</a>. To combat loneliness, people are commonly advised to seek out social connection. For many, this guidance brings to mind spending time with loved ones, such as close friends, family and romantic partners. But are there other people we can reach out to? In our research, recently published in Communications Psychology, we examined whether people have “old friends” — individuals that they care about but with whom they have lost touch — and <a href="https://doi.org/10.1038/s44271-024-00075-8">how easily these relationships can be rekindled</a>. We found that certain strategies can help people reconnect — and, in new research, we are getting a sense that certain values and personality traits may make it easier for people to stay in touch far into the future. <h2>Reconnecting with old friends</h2> Across a series of seven studies, we found the majority of people reported having an old friend. Yet, when we asked over 400 participants how willing they would be to reach out to an old friend right now, most said they were neutral or unwilling. In fact, in one study, people reported being no more willing to reach out to an old friend than they were to talk to a stranger or pick up trash. This reluctance was observable in behaviour too. We conducted two experiments in which more than 1,000 people were given several minutes to draft and send a message to an old friend. Only 30 per cent sent the message to their old friend. Given that reaching out to an old friend could boost <a href="https://www.forbes.com/sites/nextavenue/2018/08/19/the-power-and-joy-of-reconnecting-with-old-friends/">feelings of social connection and happiness</a>, we tried designing interventions to encourage reaching out. For instance, we reminded participants that reaching out to an old friend was an act of kindness and that the recipient would appreciate it more than they realize. We also tried telling participants not to overthink it — to just send their message. Unfortunately, neither prompt was effective at encouraging more people to reach out. <h2>Reluctance to reconnect</h2> Why are people reluctant to reach out to old friends? There may be a number of reasons, including the possibility that old friends feel like strangers after time has passed. In one study with over 500 participants we asked people to list between three to five old friends, and tell us how close each one felt to them right now. The more unfamiliar an old friend felt, the less willing people were to reach out. Research has found that when people <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jesp.2022.104356">practise talking to strangers for a week</a>, they become less anxious about it. If old friends can feel like strangers, might a similar strategy encourage people to reach out to old friends? To find out, we conducted an experiment in which we randomly assigned some people to complete a three-minute warm-up activity in which they messaged current family or friends. Other participants were randomly assigned to a control condition in which they simply browsed social media for three minutes instead. Afterward, all participants were given an opportunity to write and send a message to an old friend. While only 30 per cent of participants sent their message in the control condition, over 50 per cent did so after warming-up, suggesting that practising the behaviour that underlies reaching out may make this act easier. <h2>Personality traits</h2> We are extending this research in a number of new directions. For instance, in some newly conducted and unpublished research, we are examining whether people with certain personality traits or beliefs are more likely to send a message to an old friend. Responses from over 300 people suggest that people who are open to new experiences — <a href="https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/basics/big-5-personality-traits">one of the five key personality traits studied by psychologists</a> — say they are willing to reach out to an old friend. Despite this inclination, our research found that highly open people do not necessarily communicate with old friends when given the chance. On the other hand, people’s values and beliefs may be important determinants of whether they stay in touch. Our preliminary work shows that people who see friendship as a bond that does not easily break may be more likely to reach out than others. We hope this work helps normalize the fact that friendships can fade and be hard to rekindle. That said, with some practice, people can overcome this reluctance and hit “send” to potentially open a path to connection and less loneliness.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/234895/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/lara-b-aknin-1365501">Lara B Aknin</a>, Distinguished Professor of Social Psychology, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/simon-fraser-university-1282">Simon Fraser University</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/gillian-sandstrom-1283157">Gillian Sandstrom</a>, Senior Lecturer, School of Psychology, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sussex-1218">University of Sussex</a>, and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/kristina-castaneto-1548733">Kristina Castaneto</a>, Master's Student, Psychology, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/simon-fraser-university-1282">Simon Fraser University</a> Image credits: Shutterstock This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/its-hard-to-reach-out-to-old-friends-but-doing-so-may-help-alleviate-loneliness-234895">original article</a>. </div>

Relationships

"Really unexpected": Lisa McCune opens up on Dancing With The Stars win

Lisa McCune has opened up about her journey on Dancing With The Stars following her "unexpected" <a href="https://oversixty.com.au/entertainment/tv/dancing-with-the-stars-champion-crowned" target="_blank" rel="noopener">win</a>. Monday night's finale of the show saw Lisa McCune and her dancing partner Ian Waite took home the mirrorball trophy against finalists Ant Middleton, James Stewart, Nikki Osborne, and Samantha Jade. After the win, McCune told <a href="https://7news.com.au/entertainment/celebrity/lisa-mccune-spills-on-unexpected-dancing-with-the-stars-win-c-15683539" target="_blank" rel="noopener">7News</a> that she was as shocked by the win as viewers were. “It really was unexpected,” McCune said. The actress added that she was extra thrilled for her dancing partner Ian Waite who has now taken out the Mirrorball Trophy for the first time. The win comes weeks after the gruelling DWTS process, which she admitted was more involved than she originally thought. “My agent said to me that somebody else had told them how difficult it was. And I thought, ‘Well, I probably needed a bit of a kick up the bum to do a bit more exercise’,” she says. “So I thought, ‘Well, it’d be good for me’. I started and I pretty quickly realised that the techniques involved and the different disciplines is pretty intense." “I think you underestimate how aerobically fit you actually need to be. But I gave it a red-hot go, and we had a really good time.” While McCune knew she did well through the competition, she said "Watching it back, I couldn’t recall any of the scores that we got because when you’re in the moment your adrenaline is kind of heightened, and (it’s like) watching it fresh.” As part of being crowned the Dancing With The Stars champion, Lisa was awarded $20,000 for her chosen charities: the RCD Foundation and the Harrison Riedel Foundation. <div> </div> “Both the charities I have a personal connection to in my local area, based on Victoria, both of them headed up by two amazing mums. These initiatives are spectacular.” Image credits: Instagram / Seven

Dancing With The Stars champion crowned

The winner of Dancing With The Stars has been crowned after a fierce month of competition. The semi-final saw Ben Cousins, Adam Dovile, and Shane Crawford sent home, so the five remaining stars Lisa McCune, Ant Middleton, James Stewart, Nikki Osborne, and Samantha Jade, battled it out for the final show down. For the first set of performances, each pairing was tasked with doing a freestyle routine for the judges, with Lisa and Ian landing themselves at the top of the leaderboard with a perfect score of 40. Samantha and Gustavo came in close with a score of 38, while Ant and Alex scored 34. Nikki an Aric scored 31 while James an Jorja were awarded 30 which left both pairs at the bottom of the leaderboard. Despite the audience votes being added, the scores didn't change, so the the top three pairs moved to the stage for one last chance to impress the judges. They were all tasked to choose perform a dance from the season that they thought they excelled at. Samantha and Gustavo opted to take on the foxtrot, landing a final score of 38. Ant and Alex were up next with a contemporary routine with Judge Helen Richey complimenting them for a "fantastic" performance before the panel awarded them with a final score of 36. Lisa and Ian were the last couple to hit the dancefloor and they performed the Viennese Waltz. The judges said they loved the dance but weren't sure if it was as good as the first time they did it. “But it was just gorgeous, it was absolutely stunning,” said Craig Revel-Horwood before the panel gave them a final score of 39. After a tense wait as the audiences casted their votes, Ant and Alex placed third, Samantha and Gustavo placed second and Lisa and Ian were announced as the Dancing With The Stars 2024 champions. “I’m so thrilled,” she said before praising her dance partner. "This one is so beautiful,” she said of the trophy. “Like he’s going back to the UK. What happens? Do I keep it here? It will keep my Logies company.” Images: Seven

"Words matter": Why Australia's threat level was just raised to "probable"

Anthony Albanese has announced that Australia's terror level has been raised in the wake of spy agency warnings. The Prime Minister announced the change from “possible to probable” on Monday morning at a press conference in Canberra with ASIO director-general Mike Burgess. “ASIO is raising the national terrorist and threat level from possible to probable," Mr Burgess said. “Our decision reflects that the security environment is degrading. A threat level of probable is reassessed as a greater than 50 per cent chance of attack planning in the next 12 months." “It does not mean that we have intelligence about the current attack planning or expectation of an imminent attack." The National Terrorism Threat Advisory System has a scale of five levels, beginning with Not Expected, Possible, Probable, before rising to Expected and Certain. Mr Burgess said the decision was not taken easily, as he explained, “Our decision is not a direct response to the tragic events in the Middle East. At this stage we do not believe any of the terrorist plots we have investigated in the last year have been inspired by Gaza." “Terrorist leaders offshore are not inspiring attacks onshore. This is why we did not raise the threat level in the immediate aftermath of 7 October.” Mr Albanese said the decision follows a cabinet meeting today and briefings by spy agencies. “My government’s first priority is the safety and security of Australians and this morning, I convened a national-security committee meeting to hear from the director-general," Mr Albanese said. “I want to reassure Australians that probable does not mean inevitable and it does not mean it is intelligence about an imminent threat or danger. But the advice that we have received is that more Australians are embracing a more diverse range of extreme ideologies and it is our responsibility to be vigilant. Mr Burgess said it did not mean there was any imminent threat of a terrorist attack in Australia, but said it was about being vigilant and prepared. “Australia’s security environment is more volatile and more unpredictable, you’ve heard me say many times of espionage and foreign interference, our principal security concerns,’’ he said. “While the threats to our way of life are elevated we are seeing an increase in extremism, more Australians are being radicalised and radicalised more quickly. More Australians are embracing a more diverse range of extreme ideologies and more Australians are willing to use violence to advance their cause." In response to a question from the media on the Greens, who recently accused the Labor Party of being implicit in genocide when it comes to the war in Palestine, the Prime Minister said some of the rhetoric was of concern. “Words matter and it is important that people engage in a way that is respectful, that people don’t make claims that they know are not right in order to try to secure some short-term political advantage,’’ he said. Concluding the press conference, Mr Burgess said it is up to every Australian to say vigilant and report any suspicious behaviour. He said, "This is a matter for everyone, community leaders, politicians, the media, watch your words, watch your actions. Be very careful about that because there is a direct correlation between inflamed language and inflamed tension and violence.” Image credits: LUKAS COCH/EPA-EFE/Shutterstock Editorial

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Dancing With The Stars champion crowned

"Words matter": Why Australia's threat level was just raised to "probable"

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