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"Stern warning": William Tyrrell's foster mother abused outside court

William Tyrrell's foster mother has been targeted in wild scenes outside court as she left the inquest into the child's disappearance, as another woman was seen "hurling abuse at her". When leaving court on Monday afternoon, the woman, who is unable to be named, was abused and heckled by an unknown female, as Counsel Assisting Gerard Craddock SC informed NSW Deputy State Coroner Harriet Grahame. "There is no place in civil society for that at all," he told the inquiry. "It is particularly terrible in these circumstances." He asked the coroner to "remind people in attendance that orderly conduct is required. That sort of conduct could amount to being punishable by contempt of court". Coroner Grahame said, "That is very disappointing. If that person is in this court now they should be warned (the court) can take action." "That sort of behaviour must not occur. I'm just disturbed by that sort of behaviour. I use a stern warning. Please behave." The incident was revealed at the beginning of the second day of the resumed inquest into the disappearance of the three-year-old boy 10 years ago. The inquest is probing the <a href="https://oversixty.com.au/finance/legal/new-corpse-disposal-theory-tested-in-william-tyrrell-inquest" target="_blank" rel="noopener">police theory</a> that William Tyrell's foster mother buried his body in bushland after he fell from a balcony and died on the morning he vanished from Kendall, on the NSW mid north coast, in September 2014. Image credits: NSW Police

Legal

"So ashamed": John Farnham opens up about years of abuse

John Farnham has shared explosive claims that he suffered years of abuse at the hands of his former manager at the beginning of his career. Revealing all in his new memoir The Voice Inside, which is set to be released on October 30th, the Aussie music legend opened up about the mistreatment he endured from former manager Darryl Sambell when he was a teen pop idol in the 1960s with hits like Sadie the Cleaning Lady. In an excerpt of the book published by <a href="https://www.theaustralian.com.au/subscribe/news/1/?sourceCode=TAWEB_WRE170_a_NEW&dest=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.theaustralian.com.au%2Farts%2Freview%2Fhe-drugged-me-for-years-john-farnham-reveals-predatory-industry-life-after-cancer-in-memoir-finding-the-voice%2Fnews-story%2Fc1dfc413b3bee553a0bda380bc3bec01&memtype=anonymous&mode=premium&v21=HIGH-Segment-2-SCORE&V21spcbehaviour=appendend" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Australian</a>, Farnham wrote that Sambell “drugged me for years and I had no f**king idea,” until he found a half-dissolved pill at the bottom of a cup of coffee. Asked what it was, Sambell told Farnham: “That’s just something to keep you awake.” Farnham also writes that his manager, who was openly gay, was “aggressively sexual” towards him and he was constantly fending off his advances. He wrote, “I said it often enough that I can see now that this rejection turned his attraction into jealousy, hatred and a desire for control.” The toxic relationship went on for years, with Sambell controlling “where and when I worked, what I sang, what I wore, what I ate,” as Farnham ended up “isolated from friends and family,” even from wife Jill, who he married in 1973. Farnham finally sacked Sambell in 1976, later forming one of Australian music’s most successful partnerships with music manager Glenn Wheatley, who helped Farnham become a household name with his major hits of the 1980s and 90s. After Sambell died in 2001, Farnham wrote that he was forced to reflect on the early years of his career, and was overcome with a mixture of sorrow and shame: “I feel so ashamed of myself for not realising what Darryl was up to or speaking up more often to put him back in his place.” He admitted he had found it hard to “unpick” what had happened to him, until forced to confront it while writing his memoir. “But now that I’ve confronted it, I look back on that time with sorrow. I’m annoyed at myself for being so gullible and trusting,” he writes. Image credits: news.com.au / Facebook

Caring

Warning for travellers after Gold Coast man cops $13k fine

A man has copped a whopping fine after allegedly hurling abuse at airline staff at the Gold Coast airport. The 61-year-old man from Tasmania has been accused of verbally abusing an airport staff member before failing to co-operate with intervening police, and has subsequently been charged with allegedly obstructing police and being a public nuisance. The man faced Coolangatta Magistrates Court on Monday, with the Federal Police warning other travellers that such behaviour would warrant a fine. “The maximum penalty for each offence is six months’ imprisonment or a $6452 fine,” the AFP said. The AFP warned travellers aggression would not be tolerated in airports, as Superintendent Mark Yarrow said, “Our airports are a shared space and airport staff should not be subjected to verbal abuse or any other bad behaviour.” “Our airports are a shared space and airport staff should not be subjected to verbal abuse or any other bad behaviour." “The AFP works closely with our partners in the airline industry to intervene if anyone’s behaviour in or around an airport becomes aggressive.” Image credits: Shutterstock

Travel Trouble

"Misleading": IOC condemns "abuse" hurled at Olympic boxer

The International Olympic Committee (IOC) has released a statement to condemn the "abuse" and "discrimination" that has targeted Algerian boxer Imane Khelif after her controversial match in Paris. The match, which was abandoned after just 46 seconds when her Italian opponent Angela Carini tapped out, caused quite the stir when Carini said she had "never been hit that hard in my life". Following the controversial match, Khelif's history came to light with many pointing out how she was permitted to fight at the Olympics despite being disqualified from the women’s boxing world championships last year for failing gender eligibility tests. Khelif, who was born female and has always identified as such, has been hit with a wave of transphobic abuse from high profile figures including J.K Rowling and Elon Musk after the revelations came to light. The 25-year-old athlete, who has been boxing since she was a child and has always competed in women’s categories, was tested by the International Boxing Association (IBA) with IBA president Umar Kremlev saying DNA tests had “proved they had XY chromosomes and were thus excluded”. For males, XY is the combination of chromosomes while XX is the combination in females. As Khelif has always identified as female, there are a number of medical conditions that can cause a woman to also have XY chromosomes. The IOC has since spoken out in defence of Khelif, denouncing the “abuse” levelled at the Khelif as “discrimination”, while confirming she had followed the eligibility criteria to compete at the Games. “Every person has the right to practise sport without discrimination,” the <a href="https://olympics.com/ioc/news/joint-paris-2024-boxing-unit-ioc-statement" target="_blank" rel="noopener">statement</a> released on Friday said. “We have seen in reports misleading information about two female athletes competing at the Olympic Games Paris 2024." The second athlete in question is referring to fellow boxer, Chinese Taipei’s Lin Yu-ting, who underwent the same testing from the IBA and returned the same XY chromosome results as Khelif. “The two athletes have been competing in international boxing competitions for many years in the women’s category, including the Olympic Games Tokyo 2020, International Boxing Association (IBA) World Championships and IBA-sanctioned tournaments." “The IOC is saddened by the abuse that the two athletes are currently receiving.” The statement went on to call out the IBA's DNA testing, reading, "The current aggression against these two athletes is based entirely on this arbitrary decision, which was taken without any proper procedure – especially considering that these athletes had been competing in top-level competition for many years." "Such an approach is contrary to good governance." Image credits: Facebook/YAHYA ARHAB/EPA-EFE/Shutterstock Editorial

Legal

Sydney Olympics icon opens up on domestic violence abuse

In a rare and candid interview, former child star Nikki Webster has spoken about her challenging journey of recovery from domestic violence. The 37-year-old, known for her iconic performance at the 2000 Sydney Olympics and the hit song "Strawberry Kisses", shared her experiences on KIIS FM’s The Kyle and Jackie O Show. Webster, now a mother of two and the owner of a dance school, opened up about her struggles during a segment of the show. When co-host Kyle Sandilands inquired about her dating life, he seemed unaware of her much-publicised marriage breakdown in 2019, where her ex-husband was charged with a domestic violence offence. “I’m single,” Webster replied, prompting Sandilands to ask, “Why? Where’s your bloke?” She described the situation as “a long story” and “not a very happy story", revealing she had faced “a pretty hard few years”. Webster was previously married to Qantas flight attendant Matthew McMah. The couple, who married in 2012, separated eight years later. In November 2019, it was revealed that McMah had been convicted of assaulting Webster earlier that year. He received an $880 fine at the Downing Centre Local Court. Encouraged by Sandilands' lighthearted questions, Webster chose to share more about her past, mentioning her challenging experiences with domestic violence. “I come from quite a bad background of some domestic violence and stuff. So, I’m happy to be on the other side of that and, you know, focusing on life and kids,” she said. Webster confirmed she is doing "great" now, focusing on her children and her life. In a previous interview with Woman’s Day, Webster expressed hope for future love while reaffirming her commitment to her children. "I hope one day the right person will come along and it will just happen," she said, adding, "But I’m really happy with being a mum; it’s my favourite job in the world." Images: Instagram / KIISFM

Family & Pets

Leaked footage shows Olympic star's horrific animal abuse

The extent of dressage star Charlotte Dujardin's "error of judgement" has been revealed, just hours after she made the snap decision to withdraw from the Olympics just days before its commencement. The British dressage star, who is a three-time gold medallist and the joint most-decorated British female Olympian, withdrew and accepted a provisional six-month ban when coming clean about her acts of <a href="https://oversixty.com.au/travel/travel-trouble/no-excuse-olympic-legend-quits-days-before-paris-games-commence" target="_blank" rel="noopener">animal abuse</a> in the lead up to the Paris Games. Just hours after announcing her withdrawal from the equestrian events, a disturbing video of a training session began to circulate, in which she is alleged to have beaten a horse with a long whip 24 times in one minute. The video, first released by Good Morning Britain, was taken four years ago and allegedly showed the 39-year-old mistreating a horse when trying to get the animal to slowly trot during a lesson with a young student. With the trainee rider mounted on the horse, Dujardin can allegedly be seen whipping the horse’s legs repeatedly. The video has outraged many, with hundreds of people taking to social media to voice their shock and horror at the acts. Leading British social commentator David Kurten wrote on X, “The cruel abuse of this horse by Charlotte Dujardin is horrific and a stain on our nation." “Two urgent questions need answers: Did she whip horses regularly? Are dozens or hundreds of other dressage horses regularly whipped and abused by other trainers?” Former editor of Horse and Hound Lucy Higginson also added, “It has profoundly shocked everybody in the equestrian world.” The video was sent anonymously to the International Federation for Equestrian Sports (FEI), who made the choice to suspend Dujardin just days before the Paris Olympics are set to begin. “The FEI has officially announced the provisional suspension of British Dressage athlete Charlotte Dujardin effective immediately from the date of notification, 23 July 2024,” it said in a statement. “This decision renders her ineligible to participate in the upcoming Paris 2024 Olympic Games or any other events under the jurisdiction of the FEI.” “According to the information received, the footage was allegedly taken several years ago during a training session conducted by Ms Dujardin at a private stable,” the organisation said. The governing body said Dujardin had confirmed she was depicted in the video and had acknowledged that her conduct was “inappropriate”. “Charlotte Dujardin requested to be provisionally suspended pending the outcome of the investigations and voluntarily withdrew from the Paris 2024 Olympic Games and also confirmed that she will not participate in any competitions pending the outcome of the FEI’s investigation,” it said. “The FEI condemns any conduct contrary to the welfare of horses and has robust rules in place to address such behaviour.” When announcing her withdrawal from the Games, Dujardin said she made an "error of judgement", saying there was "no excuse" for her behaviour. She wrote in a statement on Instagram, “What happened was completely out of character and does not reflect how I train my horses or coach my pupils, however there is no excuse. I am deeply ashamed and should have set a better example in that moment.” Image credits: Instagram / Good Morning Britain

Legal

Government launches new campaign to tackle elder abuse

The federal government has launched a new campaign to tackle elder abuse. According to the National Elder Abuse Prevalence Study, one in six older Australians experienced abuse last year, with 61 per cent of victims not seeking for help or advice. The Albanese government will spend $4.8 million on the campaign which includes a series of commercials. Council on the Ageing Australia chief executive Patricia Sparrow said the organisation believed cases were under reported. "That's why we think it's incredibly important to raise this awareness," Sparrow said. "It mostly comes from someone they know, which makes it very difficult for older people to report it or know what to do." Labor senator Jenny McAllister told Sky News: "This is something that the community needs to start thinking about. It's a scourge. "We need to eliminate it and the right place to start is with conversations with people we know and care about." "If you're feeling a little uncertain, if you think something is wrong and you're an older Australian you should speak up about it," she added. With an ageing population, it's important to raise awareness that elder abuse is not just physical violence, but emotional, financial and psychological abuse too. The commercials will run on TV, online and at medical clinics from July 28 and they aim to encourage older people to open up about the poor treatment they receive, including from their children and grandchildren. Attorney-General Mark Dreyfus will formally announce the campaign at the National Elder Abuse Conference in Adelaide on Monday. He said that elder abuse was a shameful and often hidden form of cruelty and mistreatment. "It is ugly, it is unacceptable and it must be eliminated," he said. "It is critical that we continue to work together as a community to promote the rights and safety of older people, and ensure that everyone is able to age with dignity and respect." Images: Nine

Legal

"I really thought he would kill me": Erin Molan opens up about abusive relationship

Warning: This article contains discussions of domestic violence which some readers may find confronting Radio and TV presenter Erin Molan has opened up for the first time about horrific abuse she endured at the hands of an ex-partner. Speaking candidly to the <a href="https://www.dailytelegraph.com.au/news/nsw/exclusive-interview-erin-molan-opens-up-about-horrific-abuse-she-suffered-from-a-man-she-dated/news-story/d2921145ef5010a413bab6c9a830f3bc" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Sunday Telegraph</a>, the 40-year-old presenter recalled many of her "worst" moments with her former boyfriend, sharing how she feared for her life when he became physically abusive. '“He came in drunk and dragged me out of bed and started stamping his foot into my head over and over and over,” she told the publication. “I was lying on the floor screaming and normally if I screamed really loudly he would stop because neighbours would hear. But that time he just kept going and going and it felt like my skull was going to crack open.” She said the relentless physical violence became a pattern of behaviour, and she would regularly be brutally injured. “One time he smashed a bottle over my head,” she says. “Another time I was terrified he’d throw me off a balcony. Once I ran to hide in my car and he got a rubbish bin and started smashing it against the windscreen and I feared I would be killed by glass shattering over me. “Another time he covered my face with a pillow so I couldn’t breathe. I was crying for my mum. I really thought he would kill me.” Molan said she chose not publicly discuss the abuse while her beloved dad, Senator Jim Molan, was alive because she didn’t want to break his heart, but now she wants others to know what she went through. In sharing her heartbreaking story, she also hopes she can give other victims of domestic violence the courage to come forward. “I’m not sharing my story because I want to. My preference would be for this part of my life to never be shared but with every single death I see in this space, a part of me wonders whether I could have made a difference,” she says. “Could my experience have made these beautiful, innocent women feel less alone, less ashamed, less scared and could that have been the tiny thing that may have empowered them to ask for help, the thing that might have helped to save their lives?” Molan added that while it’s confronting for her to speak out, she wants things to change, not just for her generation but for her daughter’s. As she says, “I want to worry about my daughter’s first boyfriend breaking her heart, not her bones.” Image credits: for AWAPAC/Shutterstock Editorial

Caring

Australia’s tax system is being weaponised against victims of domestic abuse. Here’s how

<div class="theconversation-article-body"> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/ann-kayis-kumar-466422">Ann Kayis-Kumar</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/unsw-sydney-1414">UNSW Sydney</a> When women seeking financial help from the government-funded UNSW <a href="https://www.unsw.edu.au/business/our-schools/accounting-auditing-taxation/about-us/unsw-clinic">Tax and Business Advisory Clinic</a> are asked whether they have ever been affected by family or domestic violence, most say they have. In the past year this number has grown from <a href="https://cdn.theconversation.com/static_files/files/3339/sub009.pdf?1718777706">65%</a> to over 80%. And about <a href="https://ssrn.com/abstract=4746954">14%</a> of the clinic’s clients say their tax debts are a result of intimate partner violence. These debts often arise from business debts, bankruptcy, corporate directorships and director penalty notices. We know that economic abuse is a red flag for other forms of domestic violence. Economic abuse occurs in nearly all Australian domestic and family violence cases, affecting more than <a href="https://www.abs.gov.au/statistics/people/crime-and-justice/personal-safety-australia/latest-release">2.4 million Australians</a> and costing the economy an estimated <a href="https://www.commbank.com.au/content/dam/caas/newsroom/docs/Cost%20of%20financial%20abuse%20in%20Australia.pdf">A$10.9 billion</a> a year. Unfortunately, existing laws fall well short of protecting abuse victim-survivors from financial loss. <h2>How violent partners weaponise tax</h2> The perpetrators of violence can effectively weaponise the tax system by placing tax debts solely in the names of former partners, often because they have made them directors of companies or through family businesses operating through partnerships or trusts. There is a policy assumption that family members benefit from family partnerships. But this does not always hold in practice and can be problematic when there is economic abuse because Australian tax law requires victims report and pay tax on their “share” of the family partnership’s income. The average tax debt at the tax clinic is about $90,000. This can result in debilitating financial burdens, exhausted savings, insecure housing and prolonged economic instability, well after abusive relationships end. <h2>Change is needed</h2> Australia has no specific strategy for relief of tax debts caused by financial abuse. There are “serious hardship” provisions in Australian taxation law, but these are outdated and in need of <a href="https://theconversation.com/sometimes-people-can-do-with-a-break-3-ways-tax-debt-relief-rules-are-too-tough-156948">reform</a>. Usually people do not have the funds up front so the only way the Australian Taxation Office can collect debts from the abused partner is through (generally two-year) payment plans, offsetting future tax refunds, engaging external debt collectors and initiating bankruptcy proceedings. To that end, the decision announced in this year’s budget to give the Tax Commissioner discretion <a href="https://www.ato.gov.au/about-ato/new-legislation/in-detail/businesses/changes-to-offsetting-debts-on-hold">not to offset</a> against tax returns debts previously placed “on hold” is welcome. It will provide short-term relief by enabling abuse victims to get their refunds instead of having it used by the Tax Office to reduce their debt. Colleagues Christine Speidel, Leslie Book and I want this power extended to all <a href="https://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cfm?abstract_id=4746954">forms of tax debts</a> not just for tax debts that have been placed “on hold” especially where the taxpayer is known to have experienced financial abuse. But this wouldn’t go far enough – the victim-survivors would still have the perpetrator’s tax debt hanging over them. Where this happens, financial instability can <a href="https://www.commbank.com.au/content/dam/commbank-assets/support/2021-01/unsw-report-key-findings.pdf">drive women back</a> into abusive relationships. <h2>The US shows what can be done</h2> Legislative reform to shift tax liability from abuse survivors to perpetrators is the key to helping solve the problem. <figure class="align-right zoomable"></figure> The United States has offered some form of “<a href="https://www.irs.gov/individuals/innocent-spouse-relief">innocent spouse relief</a>” since 1971. In 2011 it widened eligibility and <a href="https://www.irs.gov/pub/irs-news/ir-11-080.pdf">removed a two-year time limit</a> for requesting relief. It is important to understand the US provisions apply because the country offers jointly filed “married” tax returns. In Australia tax returns are filed by individuals. Australia’s laws would need to change to ensure abused women do not find themselves jointly liable. Any changes should also include debts incurred in the name of partnerships and company directors. The US is the first and only country to do this, largely because of the advocacy of US low-income tax clinics over decades. Australia now has such clinics, funded as part of the Tax Office <a href="https://www.ato.gov.au/individuals-and-families/financial-difficulties-and-disasters/support-to-lodge-and-pay/national-tax-clinic-program">National Tax Clinic Program</a>. Australia’s adoption of US-style rules could provide a model for other jurisdictions, increase tax debt collection (as perpetrators are likely to have better capacity to pay than victims) and foster greater confidence in the Tax Office. Most importantly, it would acknowledge that victim-survivors with tax debts should not bear responsibility for debts incurred by perpetrators. <hr /> For information and advice about family and intimate partner violence contact 1800 RESPECT (<a href="https://www.1800respect.org.au/">1800 737 732</a>). If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, contact 000. The Men’s Referral Service (<a href="https://ntv.org.au/get-help/">1300 766 491)</a> offers advice and counselling to men looking to change their behaviour.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/232609/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/ann-kayis-kumar-466422">Ann Kayis-Kumar</a>, Founding Director of UNSW Tax and Business Advisory Clinic, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/unsw-sydney-1414">UNSW Sydney</a> Image credits: Shutterstock This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/australias-tax-system-is-being-weaponised-against-victims-of-domestic-abuse-heres-how-232609">original article</a>. </div>

Money & Banking

“I’m sick of it": Boy's heartbreaking plea after racist abuse

An Anawain Gamilaroi woman has demanded change after her nine-year-old nephew was left crushed by racist abuse that he allegedly experienced at AFL training. Shaylee Matthews shared the heartbreaking video of Jarmilles breaking down in a car on LinkedIn. The young boy was still wearing his team jersey and was in tears as he repeated the racist abuse that was allegedly targeted towards him. "I hate it when you call me Black," he said through tears. "I hate when you call me monkey. It's got to stop." "I'm sick of this. I don't want there to be racism. I'm sick of it. It needs to be over." When asked if he was okay, Jarmilles replied: "No. I want to go home and go to bed now." Matthews, who works for the ACT government, said the video exposes the "harsh reality" of racism experienced by Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples. “This post and videos shared is of my 9 soon to be 10 year old nephew’s experience at AFL training (playing a game he loves) which highlights the harsh reality of racism that persists in our society, especially during National Reconciliation Week (with the theme being Now More Than Ever),” she said. “It’s a call to action for us all to confront privilege, challenge learned racism, and dismantle the systemic issues that perpetuate injustice for Indigenous youth.” "The hurtful comments and behaviours faced by Jarmilles not only reflect individual ignorance but also contribute to larger systemic inequalities," she added. She then called for the public to use Reconciliation Week as an opportunity to fight racism and advocate for change. "We must advocate for change, demand accountability, and ensure that all children, regardless of their background, are treated with dignity and respect," she said. "By standing in solidarity, raising our voices, and actively working towards a more just and inclusive society, we can create a future where every child feels safe, valued, and supported. "Let's turn this moment of pain into a catalyst for meaningful change and a brighter tomorrow for all our children." Image: LinkedIn/ news.com.au

Legal

Entire Knox team stood down after abusing female players

Knox Football Netball Club (KFNC) has stood down its entire mens development indefinitely, following reports of their "inexcusable behaviour" towards an opposing women's team. Reports emerged this week that players from the Melbourne suburban football club rated and attempted to trip over Donvale's female players as they entered the field last Sunday. “They held out their legs to trip the women over and used the phrases yes, no, mediocre, rating each female player. The players were rightly upset but they played out the rest of the game,” veteran reporter Jacqui Felgate said. “I hope the men that did this … are held to account," she continued. KFNC immediately looked into the incident, and on Thursday announced that the whole team had been “stood down indefinitely pending the outcome of the independent investigation” in an open letter shared on Facebook. They also said: "KFNC recognises that such behaviour is completely unacceptable and does not reflect the values of the club." KNFC will also implement a comprehensive behavioural and domestic violence education program across the entire club. “Participation in this program will be mandatory for all members, with a ‘no education, no play’ rule in effect,” Knox said. “KFNC is establishing an ongoing partnership with a local family violence shelter for both education and charitable support. “We understand the gravity of this situation and the importance of taking swift and decisive action. We are committed to learning from this incident and ensuring that such behaviour is not repeated in the future. “Our club stands for inclusivity, respect, and safety for all members, and we will continue to uphold these values in everything we do.” Felgate reacted to Knox's open letter and said that the action was “the very least they could do”. “Women play sport — they should not be subjected to abuse on the field, off the field, whatever, on the base of their sex,” Felgate said. A Donvale player also spoke to the Herald Sun anonymously and said that her team were already "uncomfortable" before the comments began. "We all realised what happened a lot of us broke down in tears and just felt helpless," she told the publication. "I’ve had individual men come up to me and say things that aren’t really appropriate but this was a group of 20 men standing, laughing and making comments about us. “The only thing I want to emphasise is the amount of other men from Knox that were around them not saying anything," she added. “Unfortunately I really do believe that men aren’t going to stop behaving like this unless other men call it out, they don’t listen to women.” Image: Facebook/ Knox Football Club

Legal

Independent you: preventing, and recovering from, elder abuse

From implementing safeguards to stop it from beginning to taking back control if it does, there is a lot of power in your hands to avoid elder abuse. Previously, we explored the warning signs of elder abuse and how <a href="https://www.oversixty.com.au/finance/retirement-income/are-you-a-victim-of-elder-abuse-without-even-realising-it">it is possible to be a victim without even realising it</a>. And with more wealth owned by people over 60 now than ever before, the potential for abuse only continues to grow. So, how can you prevent elder abuse happening to you? And if you are already experiencing it, what can you do to regain control over your finances, independence and wellbeing? Prevention better than cure The best way to avoid the impacts of elder abuse is to protect yourself against it beginning in the first place. Awareness is the first step, so having <a href="https://www.oversixty.com.au/finance/retirement-income/are-you-a-victim-of-elder-abuse-without-even-realising-it">read this article and knowing the warning signs</a>, you’re already ahead of the game! Other preventative actions include: <ul> <li>Maintaining contact: social interactions are important not just for warding off loneliness but providing access to other points of view and avenues for support. </li> <li>External advisers: engage your own advisers – don’t simply employ who someone tells you to. They should be an impartial, qualified set of eyes to monitor things for you and point out anything that doesn’t seem right. This includes a financial advisor, lawyer, accountant, doctor and so on. A support person attending appointments with you may give you extra assurance.</li> <li>Power of attorney/guardianship: nominate multiple people, so that no one individual has all the say. It can be useful to include someone who is not a relative for impartiality, such as a trusted friend or your lawyer. </li> <li>Superannuation beneficiaries: super is separate from your will, but beneficiary nominations can only be spouse, child, dependent or interdependent otherwise it will go to you Will. In your Will you can direct to other people or charities. Some beneficiaries lapse, so will need to be renewed.</li> <li>Wills: review your will to ensure it reflects YOUR wishes, not someone else’s. People can jostle over not only their own inheritance but may try to influence you to leave others out. </li> <li>Documenting everything: keep a written record, especially where money is concerned – such as acting as Bank of Mum and Dad for adult kids to purchase property. Outline how much is given, what if any interest/repayments are expected and when, and what happens if their relationship subsequently breaks down.</li> <li>Encouraging independence: people who have come to expect handouts can become abusive if those handouts stop or requests for more are denied. Support and encourage others, especially your kids, to be financially independent and self-sufficient.</li> </ul> Taking back control Sadly, prevention is no longer an option for an <a href="https://www.aihw.gov.au/family-domestic-and-sexual-violence/population-groups/older-people?xd_co_f=YjAzZDU4YTUtYzA5YS00YTNkLWJkNDQtNjdiZTM5ZmY5ZjQx#abuse">estimated 598,000 Australians</a> already experiencing elder abuse. However, it is still possible to break the cycle. Don’t be embarrassed or stick your head in the sand hoping things will improve. You have done nothing wrong. You are entitled to enjoy your retirement years. To take back control over your affairs, your wellbeing and your independence: <ul> <li>Ensure your physical safety first and foremost.</li> <li>Seek medical attention for your physical and mental health (the latter is crucial for making good decisions around the other points on this list).</li> <li>Get support from another relative, close friend, neighbour, or other trusted person. Don’t be alone.</li> <li>Secure a roof over your head. Having a stable place to live gives you the security and focus to tackle other concerns.</li> <li>Freeze access to your money – bank accounts, credit cards etc. This will stop (further) unauthorised withdrawals or purchases being charged to you.</li> <li>Seek professional advice. Your financial adviser, tax accountant and lawyer will be able to guide you through protecting your home, money, guardianship and estate planning matters.</li> <li>Make informed changes. Don’t do anything rashly – make necessary changes once you have sought independent advice and considered your options. This may involve making changes to your power of attorney, will, superannuation, bank accounts, even your phone number in extreme cases.</li> <li>Consider counselling. Your abuser may not realise the severity of their actions. An independent counsellor may be able to help them see this and change their ways, and ultimately salvage your relationship.</li> </ul> If you or someone you know is experiencing elder abuse, seek help straight away. Speak to a trusted relative or friend. Seek independent legal and financial advice about your affairs. Or call the government’s free elder abuse line on 1800 353 374. And if your life is in danger, call triple zero (000) immediately. Helen Baker is a licensed Australian financial adviser and author of On Your Own Two Feet: The Essential Guide to Financial Independence for all Women. Helen is among the 1% of financial planners who hold a master’s degree in the field. Proceeds from book sales are donated to charities supporting disadvantaged women and children. Find out more at <a href="http://www.onyourowntwofeet.com.au/">www.onyourowntwofeet.com.au</a> Disclaimer: The information in this article is of a general nature only and does not constitute personal financial or product advice. Any opinions or views expressed are those of the authors and do not represent those of people, institutions or organisations the owner may be associated with in a professional or personal capacity unless explicitly stated. Helen Baker is an authorised representative of BPW Partners Pty Ltd AFSL 548754. Image credits: Getty Images

Caring

Are you a victim of elder abuse without even realising it?

A wealthy widow being told how to manage her money. A retired couple being denied access to their grandchildren. A single woman paying her high income-earning son’s credit card debt with her superannuation. Very different Australians with one unfortunate thing in common – they are all victims of elder abuse. While most people are familiar with the term ‘domestic violence’, the term ‘elder abuse’ is less well known. Which in itself is part of the problem: a lack of awareness helps perpetuate the cycle. The World Health Organization (WHO) <a href="https://www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/abuse-of-older-people" target="_blank" rel="noopener">defines elder abuse</a> as: “a single or repeated act, or lack of appropriate action, occurring within any relationship where there is an expectation of trust, which causes harm or distress to an older person. This type of violence constitutes a violation of human rights.” It isn’t necessarily restricted to actions that leave physical scars – which can make it harder to identify, even for victims themselves. The absence of physical violence or financial theft can provide a false sense of security. Not recognising the signs that something is amiss lets mistreatment go unnoticed altogether. Alternatively, excuses are made for a loved one’s behaviour or concerns aren’t raised in order to ‘keep the peace’. How prevalent is elder abuse in Australia? The limited discussion of elder abuse in the media and society in general would suggest it isn’t common in Australia. Sadly, this couldn’t be more wrong. <a href="https://www.aihw.gov.au/family-domestic-and-sexual-violence/population-groups/older-people#abuse" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Government figures</a> estimate that one in six older people – around 598,000 individuals – were directly affected in 2023. Psychological abuse was the most widespread, while 2.1 per cent of older Australians – 83,800 people – experienced financial abuse. Who is responsible? The saddest fact of all is that elder abuse is typically committed by people their victims should be able to trust the most. More than half (53 per cent) of perpetrators are family members: adult children are the most common, with partners/spouses ranking third. Friends are the second most common perpetrators. What are the impacts? Impacts of elder abuse are typically far-reaching and depend on the type of abuse involved. Among them are: <ul> <li>Loss of control and independence</li> <li>Physical and mental health issues</li> <li>Relationship breakdowns</li> <li>Financial losses</li> <li>Insecure living arrangements</li> </ul> It is not uncommon for older people to be pressured over how to manage their finances and estate planning, influencing everything from how much they have to live off in retirement to care arrangements in their final years and who benefits from their estate. Much of the abuse and subsequent fallout centres around the family home. Charity <a href="https://www.theforgottenwomen.org.au/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Forgotten Women</a> notes there are over 40,000 women aged 55-plus who are homeless in Queensland alone. Elder abuse is often a contributing – if not causal – factor, such as one woman forced to live in her car while her son occupies her home. Meanwhile, the current housing crisis creates ideal conditions for abuse to flourish. Multi-generational households risk reduced independence and increased control over older people. A lack of proper agreements and structures when the Bank of Mum and Dad assists with a home deposit and/or loan guarantee opens the door to expectations of further financial assistance or threats to default on guaranteed loans. Warning signs of elder abuse Besides physical violence, red flags to look for include: <ul> <li>Coercive control – undue pressure over decision-making, living arrangements, spending and investment strategies, pensions, superannuation, tax, legal affairs and wills, ownership of assets, power of attorney.</li> <li>Guilt – emotional manipulation and ‘guilt-tripping’ for not meeting particular demands.</li> <li>Isolation – from family and friends as well as from independent professional advisers (your accountant, financial adviser, lawyer, healthcare professionals etc.).</li> <li>Money mismanagement – taking cash without consent; restricting access to money and assets; pressure to pay expenses that aren’t yours.</li> <li>Neglect and abandonment – withholding essentials or anything that is needed to maintain quality of life.</li> <li>Blackmail – a tragically common example is withholding access to grandchildren unless financial or legal demands are met.</li> </ul> Given the potentially disastrous consequences, it is important to recognise the signs and act quickly. Don’t suffer in silence or hope that things will sort themselves out. If you or someone you know is experiencing elder abuse, seek help straight away. Speak to a trusted relative or friend. Seek independent legal and financial advice about your affairs. Or call the government’s <a href="https://www.health.gov.au/contacts/elder-abuse-phone-line" target="_blank" rel="noopener">free elder abuse line on 1800 353 374</a>. And if your life is in danger, call triple zero (000) immediately. About the Author: Helen Baker is a licensed Australian financial adviser and author of On Your Own Two Feet: The Essential Guide to Financial Independence for all Women. Helen is among the 1% of financial planners who hold a master’s degree in the field. Proceeds from book sales are donated to charities supporting disadvantaged women and children. Find out more at <a href="http://www.onyourowntwofeet.com.au/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">www.onyourowntwofeet.com.au</a> Disclaimer: The information in this article is of a general nature only and does not constitute personal financial or product advice. Any opinions or views expressed are those of the authors and do not represent those of people, institutions or organisations the owner may be associated with in a professional or personal capacity unless explicitly stated. Helen Baker is an authorised representative of BPW Partners Pty Ltd AFSL 548754. Image: Getty

Retirement Income

Princess Diana's brother reveals tragic secret

Charles Spencer has bravely detailed the alleged sexual abuse he experienced as a child. The younger brother of Princess Diana, now 59, initially made the revelation that he was abused as a child while in boarding school when he was 42. Now, the 9th Earl Spencer is recalling the alleged trauma in his new memoir A Very Private School, and the first moment he told anyone about the abuse he experienced. “I was doing a 10-day course of very deep introspection and therapy,” he told Fox News Digital. “My therapist said to each of us, ‘Whisper to me one secret you’d never told anyone.’ I whispered to him that I was sexually abused as a child by an adult. "And I remember him looking so shocked, and he had heard it all. Afterwards, he took me aside and said, ‘This is very serious stuff.’” He added that at that stage, he already had children, and having kids of his own made him realise how devastating his experience was. “I suddenly put it into context. What if one of my children of either gender had been subjected to this as an 11-year-old? It made my blood boil," he said. "I then started to allow myself to feel the full devastation of what had happened to me.” Spencer was eight when he was enrolled at Maidwell Hall, an elite English boarding school, and he claimed that it didn't take long for him to witness and experience incidents of alleged abuse. He claimed that he was groomed and sexually abused at age 11 by an assistant matron at the school, who was 19 or 20 years old. “It was a brutal experience,” he claimed in his memoir. “The headmaster was a sadistic pedophile. He staffed a very small number of teachers in this place who were either … perverted or would never tell tales against him. There wasn’t really anyone to go to.“ He added that the beatings had become "a ritual part of every day," and his parents had no idea the extent of what was going on behind closed doors. The royal also alleged that one student was whipped so badly he struggled to take off his pants at night because the dried blood and clothing stuck to his skin, and that it took two weeks for him to recover. Spencer claimed he was allowed to write a letter to his parents once a week, with the messages being supervised so he was unable to tell his parents what was going on. “We were just left there at the mercy of some really dangerous people,” Spencer alleged. He said that meeting with other former pupils was what motivated him to write the new memoir, and revisit the painful memories of his past. The historian recalled the moment he met another former student, who kept quiet about the abuse he experience because it was so traumatising. "He told me how he was made to feel worthless every day, how he’d been seriously sexually assaulted as a nine-year-old three times by somebody who was meant to protect him," he recalled. “I took 10 pages of notes, stopped and said, ‘This is too terrible — I can’t tell this story.’ He reached across, grabbed my arm and said, ‘Somebody has to do it – it’s got to be you.’ That convinced me, the truth needed to be shared with the world.” The 9th Earl also said that he is undergoing “a very effective” post-traumatic stress disorder treatment, as well as Tai Chi and breathing exercises. “I’ve got a whole armoury of support techniques to try and get to a better place,” he shared. Image: Getty

Caring

“I was silenced”: Jelena Dokic opens up on her difficult relationship with her father

Jelena Dokic has opened up about her difficult relationship with her father, and why she attempted to reconcile with him over ten years ago. The former tennis champion shared the details of the abuse she suffered at the hands of her father, documenting that he inflicted regular beatings in her new book Unbreakable. The 40-year-old said her victories on the court made no difference to her father’s violence, writing, “Even if I won, I would still at times be beaten and be abused. I had some very difficult moments where I was beaten and kicked and punched to the point of being unconscious.” Throughout her tennis career, her father Damir was her coach, and accepted nothing less than perfection from his daughter. “I was silenced for my whole life. From the very first day that I started playing tennis, the No. 1 rule was ‘Never tell anyone anything, or there will be massive, massive consequences’,” she said of his dominating personality. Now, Dokic has candidly shared the details of the last time she saw her father, who left her mentally scarred. “I last had contact with him about 10 years ago. And yeah, I even tried to reconcile with him once or twice,” she told the <a href="https://www.smh.com.au/sport/tennis/why-i-and-so-many-others-needed-to-apologise-to-jelena-dokic-20240125-p5f050.html">Sydney Morning Herald</a>. “I think no matter what happens, you kind of hope that maybe you can kind of salvage a relationship when it comes to family.” “Those dynamics are always very difficult. But it's very hard when someone doesn't have any remorse or can't say sorry. In fact, what he says is that he would do it all again. So, for me, that is very, very hard.” “I had to make a cut and go, ‘I don't need a toxic person or a toxic relationship in my life’.” Thankfully, the star player turned tennis commentator is in a much better place with her brother and mother. “I have a great relationship with my brother, which I'm really glad about because my father used my brother and weaponised our relationship - not allowing me to talk with him for about seven years, because he was so much younger than me,” she said. “We pretty much talk every day, and with my mum, as well. I've had some tough conversations with her because she was on my father's side - but we're in a good place today.” Image credits: Getty Images / Instagram

Family & Pets

Bruce Lehrmann targeted at the cricket by vigilantes

Bruce Lehrmann has been forced to flee the Sydney Cricket Ground after being targeted by four men who flung relentless abuse at him. The former Liberal staffer was attending the third Test match that saw Australia take on Pakistan at Sydney's Entertainment Quarter on Friday with his best friend, when the men started slinging insults at him. The four men, who appeared to be in their 30s, followed Lehrmann for roughly 300 metres while he was walking back to the SCG, as they taunted him over Brittany Higgins' rape allegations, mocking his physical appearance, trying to spit on him, and telling him to jump off the top bay. Despite always vehemently denying the rape allegations, the men shouted at Lehrmann saying, "Don't you know what consent is Bruce? You f***ing fat pr*ck." "Keep your d*** in your pants, f***ing rapist." After entering the SCG grounds, the men followed him up the escalator while continuing to insult him. "You up in the top bay?" they yelled. "You pr**k, jump off it - we will be ready to p*ss on you." A member of the group taunted him to "go back to your air conditioned mansion, you pr**k", adding that "Channel Seven will protect you". Mr Lehrmann's $2000-per-week rental property, on Sydney's northern beaches, was paid for by the TV network for a year in exchange for two exclusive interviews on its Spotlight program. Lehrmann was so shaken by the incident, that he and his friend fled the venue. Mr Lehrmann later described the incident as "abhorrent" and slammed the men for abusing him in front of children and their parents who were trying to enjoy the Pink Test, which is a special match to raise money for breast cancer. "The abhorrent physical and verbal abuse, threats and taunts from the idiots towards me are a reflection of the intellect and character of those blokes," he said. "What is most concerning is they thought it appropriate to hurl the profanity-laden abuse around dozens of children and families who, like me, simply wanted to enjoy a fun day at the cricket supporting Pink Test." Image credits: Getty Images

Legal

About 1 in 6 older Australians experiences elder abuse. Here are the reasons they don’t get help

<a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/eileen-obrien-95332">Eileen O'Brien</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-south-australia-1180">University of South Australia</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/catriona-stevens-1455614">Catriona Stevens</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/edith-cowan-university-720">Edith Cowan University</a>, and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/loretta-virginia-baldassar-1485078">Loretta Virginia Baldassar</a> Each year, many older Australians experience abuse, neglect or financial exploitation, usually at the hands of their adult children or other close relatives. A recent <a href="https://aifs.gov.au/research/research-reports/national-elder-abuse-prevalence-study-final-report">national prevalence study</a> revealed one in six older Australians living at home experiences elder abuse. This may encompass various forms of abuse, such as emotional, financial, social, physical and sexual abuse, or neglect. Despite elder abuse being such a common problem, older people often don’t get the help they need. With the right responses, we can make it easier for those working with older people, and the wider community, to support them. Our <a href="https://www.wa.gov.au/system/files/2023-11/everyones_business_research_into_responses_to_the_abuse_of_older_in_wa_report.pdf">new research</a> reveals the key reasons older people experiencing harm do not receive the support they so desperately need. Our study included a survey of nearly 700 service providers throughout Western Australia. Respondents worked in diverse fields including healthcare, law, aged care, financial services and law enforcement. We found four key obstacles to people getting help with elder abuse. 1. Older people are too scared to report abuse. Older people are often afraid to report abuse because they fear repercussions both for themselves and for the perpetrator, usually an adult child or other close relative. These concerns can mean an older person endures abuse for a long time. They may only seek help when the situation escalates to an extreme level or when someone else notices the ongoing mistreatment. Equally important, they may fear other negative outcomes of reporting abuse. They may fear having to leave their home and enter residential care. They may fear increased isolation and loneliness, or that the abuse will get worse. All these fears combined create a formidable barrier to older people promptly reporting abuse and getting the help they need. <blockquote class="twitter-tweet"> <a href="https://twitter.com/hashtag/ElderAbuse?src=hash&ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">#ElderAbuse</a> is more common than people realize. It can happen: In their own homes In hospitals In nursing homes or other kinds of long-term care facilities Learn more, including how to prevent elder abuse: <a href="https://t.co/CAkBHQO4gm">https://t.co/CAkBHQO4gm</a><a href="https://twitter.com/hashtag/Alzheimers?src=hash&ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">#Alzheimers</a> <a href="https://twitter.com/hashtag/dementia?src=hash&ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">#dementia</a> <a href="https://twitter.com/hashtag/aging?src=hash&ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">#aging</a> <a href="https://twitter.com/hashtag/geriatrics?src=hash&ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">#geriatrics</a> <a href="https://t.co/gO3Dc6Dy3Z">pic.twitter.com/gO3Dc6Dy3Z</a> — Ian Kremer (@LEAD_Coalition) <a href="https://twitter.com/LEAD_Coalition/status/1720567529200918550?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">November 3, 2023</a></blockquote> 2. Older people don’t know where to turn for help Elder abuse cases are often complex, involving long family histories and complicated relationships. Older people trying to improve their situation may need support from multiple service providers. The challenge of accessing the right services and acting on their advice can be daunting. Addressing complicated matters may require intensive support and advocacy for an extended time. In the words of one experienced advocate, <blockquote> People don’t need to know the next ten steps. They need to know one step, maybe two, and then see where they are at. </blockquote> Helping older people feel empowered to seek help requires simple, accessible channels of assistance, promoted through multiple formats and outreach efforts. 3. Government-funded responses to family violence are more focused on intimate partner violence and child protection, leaving elder abuse out of the picture Most programs targeting family violence prioritise intimate partner violence and child protection, inadvertently sidelining elder abuse. Services such as shelters and perpetrator programs are not always compatible with the distinct characteristics of elder abuse. Additionally, the gendered nature of family violence responses fails to address the diverse demographics of elder abuse, which includes older men. As a result, older people, regardless of gender, may struggle to access supports suited to their needs. A refuge manager explained: <blockquote> When a bed becomes available we have this awful job of deciding who’s more high-risk and who gets the bed. If an older person needs the bed, as opposed to a single mum with a newborn, unfortunately we would go with the mum. That really presents a barrier where there isn’t refuge accommodation specifically for older people. </blockquote> There is a pressing need for a shift in focus to better recognise elder abuse as a significant issue and tailor responses to meet the specific needs of older people. This includes creating safe and accessible refuge options and providing specialised support services to address the multifaceted nature of elder abuse. 4. There’s low public awareness about what elder abuse looks like or how to respond Awareness of elder abuse remains surprisingly low, hindering effective responses. Changing this requires clear public information campaigns and community-wide conversations about abuse. This includes greater awareness of the challenge for well-meaning adult children who might limit the choices of their older relatives, thinking they know best. This can result in unintended social isolation or even neglect. A society that speaks openly about elder abuse, without stigma, is better equipped to support victims and intervene. By building public knowledge and promoting a culture where such issues can be freely discussed, we lay the groundwork for reducing its incidence. We are living longer lives than ever before, meaning we can expect to spend more years in older age than previous generations. This is good news, but also means we need to do more work to support people to age well. Positive steps we can all take include tackling ageism when we see it and normalising conversations about abuse so older people can feel confident to seek help when it’s needed.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/216827/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/eileen-obrien-95332">Eileen O'Brien</a>, Professor of Law, Discipline of Law, Justice and Society, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-south-australia-1180">University of South Australia</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/catriona-stevens-1455614">Catriona Stevens</a>, Forrest Prospect Fellow in Sociology and Anthropology, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/edith-cowan-university-720">Edith Cowan University</a>, and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/loretta-virginia-baldassar-1485078">Loretta Virginia Baldassar</a>, Vice Chancellor Professorial Research Fellow, School of Arts and Humanities, Edith Cowan University This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/about-1-in-6-older-australians-experiences-elder-abuse-here-are-the-reasons-they-dont-get-help-216827">original article</a>.

Legal

William Tyrrell's foster mother pleads guilty to assault

William Tyrrell's foster mother has been found guilty of assaulting a child. The 58-year-old woman, who cannot be named for legal reasons, appeared in Parramatta’s Local Court on Monday morning alongside her husband. She entered guilty pleas to two counts of common assault relating to a child, who is not William. Despite her plea, she plans to fight the charges after also pleading not guilty to two counts of intimidation. Her husband, 56, has pleaded not guilty to one count of common assault and one count of intimidation. The court heard details of the incidents that took place between January and August 2021, with the foster mother previously trying to have the charges in question withdrawn on mental health grounds. The couple will face a contested hearing before Magistrate Susan McIntyre, with the hearing expected to last five days. William was only three years old when he vanished from his foster grandmother’s house at Kendall on the NSW mid North Coast on September 12th 2014. The case attracted national attention and has become one of the state’s most notable cold cases. No one has been charged over William’s disappearance and suspected death, and his foster parents have continued to deny any wrongdoing. Image credits: NSW Police <div class="media image" style="caret-color: #000000; color: #000000; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: auto; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: auto; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; text-decoration: none; box-sizing: inherit; margin-bottom: 24px; display: flex; flex-direction: column; align-items: center; width: 705.202209px;"> </div>

Legal

What does financial abuse really look like?

Sally is in her 20s, lives in a dilapidated rental home and works three jobs. Fifty-something Sarah owns a large home, drives a Mercedes and is a corporate executive. Pensioner Scott, in his mid-70s, still lives in the home in which he and his late wife raised their children. Who would you say is more vulnerable to financial abuse? The answer, you may be surprised to learn, is all three. Financial abuse, according to the government’s <a href="https://moneysmart.gov.au/living-in-retirement/financial-abuse">MoneySmart</a>, is a type of family and domestic violence: “It often happens alongside other types of violence, such as physical or emotional abuse. It can leave you feeling vulnerable, isolated, depressed and anxious. It can also take away your independence.” Commonly a spouse or partner is the perpetrator, but it can come from any relative or friend. A <a href="https://www.commbank.com.au/content/dam/caas/newsroom/docs/Cost%2520of%2520financial%2520abuse%2520in%2520Australia.pdf">2022 Commonwealth Bank report</a> suggests over 623,000 Australians experienced financial abuse in 2020 alone – roughly one in 30 women and one in 50 men. Anyone – regardless of age, wealth etc. – can be a victim. Financial abuse has many faces Just as finances are complex, so too is financial abuse, which can be viewed from many angles: <ul> <li>Couples: One partner controls everything money related. I know of one instance where a woman’s partner went so far as counting coffee pods; another checked car mileage to stop his partner driving further than school drop-offs.</li> <li>Exes: Not working specifically to avoid paying child support; withholding information to delay settlement; bullying into a menial settlement.</li> <li>Multi-generations: Children or grandchildren milking elderly relatives; seizing control over their finances and living arrangements.</li> <li>Non-relatives: Such as friends buying property together without properly documenting everything, then fighting come sale time.</li> <li>Business relationships: Duped signatures on trust and business documents; hiding debts; impeding or undervaluing someone’s exit.</li> </ul> Warning signs There are common warning signs that you, or someone you know, is suffering financial abuse: <ul> <li>Pressure to make decisions: to invest your money or superannuation in crazy things that go bust, or to do nothing and not keep up with inflation (let alone grow your wealth), go guarantor on a loan, or sign power of attorney.</li> <li>Draining money: using your money to fund their business or investment on the promise a return is coming that never does (which could be poor management or deliberate deceit). This could continue for years until you’re left homeless and bankrupt.</li> <li>Unfair claims: your partner came into the relationship with nothing and stays just long enough to make a claim on your home.</li> <li>Controlled spending: this may start small (‘Don’t spend so much on clothes!’) but can become extreme. </li> <li>Blackmail: I’ve heard of people denied access to their grandkids unless they gave their son/daughter money or amended their will.</li> <li>Restricted access: you’re denied access to your own or joint finances, from having your own accounts, or are banned from working to earn your own income and superannuation.</li> <li>Tracking: sharing your location by smartphone may sound practical or safe but is open to abuse.</li> <li>Social isolation: cutting you off from friends and family; pressing for an interstate move.</li> <li>Reckless spending: your money is spent haphazardly – you may be kept in the dark or pressured not to ask questions.</li> <li>Tying down: trapping you into a big mortgage to crimp your freedom.</li> <li>Guilting: I have seen wealthy adults guilt their less fortunate parents into paying their bills, and gambling addicts guilt partners into paying their debts (with no intention to address their addiction or plan to pay it back).</li> </ul> Protecting yourself The best prevention of all is to avoid thinking ‘it won’t happen to me’. So many victims of financial abuse once thought exactly the same. Other tips include: <ul> <li>Speak up: Sometimes, starting a conversation can be enough to deliver positive change and even save a relationship (avoiding divorce is cheaper for everyone!)</li> <li>Have an emergency fund – cash only you can access, easily, in a crisis.</li> <li>Keep separate bank accounts – deposit your income here, then transfer money for joint bills into a joint account. </li> <li>Make decisions together – don’t leave money matters to your partner/children. It’s your money too.</li> <li>Get outside perspective: financial advisers are accountable to you as their client and help provide visibility over your assets, liabilities and risks. Ensure they are qualified and currently practicing.</li> </ul> If you think you may be a victim of financial abuse, I beg you – seek help immediately. Suffering in silence and letting the situation snowball is the costliest thing you can do. Both financially and emotionally! <a href="http://www.lifeline.org.au/">Lifeline - </a>13 11 14 <a href="https://www.1800respect.org.au/">1800RESPECT - </a>1800 737 732 <a href="https://www.familyrelationships.gov.au/talk-someone/advice-line">Family Relationship Advice Line - </a>1800 050 32 <a href="https://goodshep.org.au/">Good Shepherd Australia Financial Independence Hub - </a>1300 050 150 <a href="http://www.ndh.org.au/">National Debt Helpline - </a>1800 007 007 Helen Baker is a licensed Australian financial adviser and author of the new book, On Your Own Two Feet: The Essential Guide to Financial Independence for all Women (Ventura Press, $32.99). Helen is among the 1% of financial planners who hold a master’s degree in the field. Proceeds from book sales are donated to charities supporting disadvantaged women and children. Find out more at <a href="http://www.onyourowntwofeet.com.au">www.onyourowntwofeet.com.au</a> Image credits: Getty Images

Money & Banking

Terminally ill teacher convicted of child abuse granted end-of-life permit

A convicted child abuser from Adelaide, who was imprisoned for his acts of paedophilia against students during his tenure as a music teacher, has been authorised to pursue assisted dying, according to an exclusive report by <a href="https://www.9news.com.au/national/exclusive-adelaide-news-jailed-paedophile-teacher-malcolm-day-given-end-of-life-permit-voluntary-assisted-dying/cab7e95c-f3b1-4dbd-ae0d-cc8dbfee22c0" target="_blank" rel="noopener">9News</a>. Malcolm Day, aged 81, has emerged as the first incarcerated individual in Australia to receive approval for voluntary assisted dying following a terminal illness diagnosis, reportedly linked to cancer. Having received a 20-year prison sentence last June, Day's remaining term spans 17 years. Navigating the 11-step process required for accessing voluntary assisted dying in South Australia, Day's application is reported to be in its concluding stages, potentially reaching completion within the next few days. Dr Philip Nitschke, the director of the pro-euthanasia organisation Exit International, acknowledged that an incarcerated individual availing themselves of this scheme was an inevitable eventuality. "By the sounds of it, he satisfies all the conditions of the South Australian assisted dying legislation," Dr Nitschke told 9News. "So there should be no impediment… he should be given the option that any other person would have if they were terminally ill." During the 1980s, Day, while serving as a music teacher in South Australia, inflicted profound and lasting harm upon two of his students. After grooming and exploiting his victims, he vehemently refuted all allegations when investigated by educational authorities. When Day was sentenced, his legal representative, Stephen Ey, acknowledged the real possibility of his client passing away behind bars, saying at the time that it was "a real prospect... given his age." According to the latest data from SA Health, since the initiation of voluntary assisted dying in January of this year, 39 terminally ill residents of South Australia have opted to peacefully conclude their lives after being granted the necessary permits. Image: Nine News

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Terminally ill teacher convicted of child abuse granted end-of-life permit

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