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10 polite habits nail techs actually dislike – and what to do instead

Nail salon etiquette mistakes Repeat after us: Pampering yourself is important. An easy way to do just that? Getting a manicure. Not only is it relatively affordable, but prettily painted nails can also put an extra pep in your step. Of course, the nail tech who does your manicure plays a large role in making you feel so good: From that wonderful hand massage to getting your cuticles in tip-top shape, their skills can make a huge difference. So, it only makes sense that you’d want to treat them really well. But here’s the thing: Certain seemingly polite etiquette rules can actually make a nail tech’s job harder. Plus, while it’s important to be nice, you don’t have to try extra hard to make their life easier. “A manicure is your time off, so you should relax,” says Karina Medrano, a nail technician. So what does that mean? It means there are certain polite habits that are totally a must. And then there are other moves you can (and should) skip so you can focus on your own relaxation. Since it can be hard to identify exactly what most people dislike, we turned to the pros to fill us in on polite moves that are actually etiquette mistakes at the nail salon. Anticipating their next move Over the course of your manicure, your nail tech will likely move your hands around a bit – turning them over to apply lotion and rotating each finger to paint your tips with the best nail polish. If you’ve had a number of manicures, you may even be able to anticipate what they’ll need you to do next and be tempted to save them from having to tell you how to move. Don’t do it. “Many times, clients position themselves in a way that seems to be helpful, but it’s the contrary,” says Medrano. You may make the wrong move and actually mess up their paint job, causing them to have to start over. Do this instead: “It’s best to let your nail tech move you around,” says Medrano. “There is no need to tense up – just relax.” Put simply, wait for them to direct you. One way to make that easier is to pay attention to what’s going on. If you have headphones on and are listening to music or a podcast, keep it at a low enough volume that you can hear your technician if they need you to do something. Keeping the conversation going When you’re getting your nails done, you’re literally face to face with your manicurist. Because of this, you may feel like it’s your job to chat with them and keep them entertained. But there’s no need to rack your brain for conversation starters. This is a job, and there is zero expectation that you should keep your nail tech entertained, says Medrano. If you want to chat, no problem. If you don’t? Well, that’s OK too. Do this instead: If you’d prefer quiet, Medrano says that it’s become totally normal to ask for a “silent appointment”. You can either let the salon know when you book your appointment or you can mention to your tech when you sit down that you are going to use the appointment to relax and have some quiet time. Giving a colour a chance when you don't like it You arrive at the salon and are faced with a wall of nail polish colours. Whether you want the trendiest colour of the season or just what you’re in the mood for, you’ll probably spend some time debating the perfect shade. Fast-forward to the moment your manicurist is slicking it on, and – you’re not so sure about it. But you feel bad and want to give it a chance. Maybe you’ll like it once the second coat is on, right? And you’d hate to make the tech take it off and start over. “For many, the hardest time to speak up during their appointment is when they don’t like the colour,” says Medrano. “But it’s better to tell us the second you start doubting your choice. Applying the colour is the most time-consuming part, and catching the colour change before doing all 10 fingers helps us stay on track with our appointments.” Plus, your nail tech wants you to walk away happy! Do this instead: If you’re not feeling the colour, speak up as soon as possible. You can simply tell them you’re not sure you like it. Then, tell them what you don’t like – maybe the red you chose is too orange or the pink is too sheer. They may be able to suggest another shade that is what you are looking for. After all, they see lots of different colours every day. Removing your own gel If you get gel manicures, you know that removing that type of polish can take a long time. You have to sit with remover on your nails for a while before the gel can be scraped away. But trying to do it at home to save time and work for your nail tech is not advisable. Gel polish needs to be removed in a certain way to minimise damage, warns nail artist Braelinn Frank. If you try to remove it yourself and wreck your nails, your tech will be left trying to get them back into shape to prevent your nails from peeling. Do this instead: When you make your appointment, let them know you have gel polish that will need to be removed. This allows the salon to build in more time for your appointment so the gel can be removed properly by a professional and you don’t make a bigger mess for your manicurist. Deferring to the pro Do you want rounded nails or more of an almond shape? Do you want your cuticles cut, or do you just want your manicurist to use really good cuticle oil before pushing them back? These are all decisions you’ll need to make during your appointment. Don’t just defer to the tech. Yes, they’re pros, but these are your nails. “It’s helpful when someone knows what they want their nails to look like,” says Medrano. Do this instead: If you really aren’t sure what you want, avoid telling the nail tech to do whatever they’d like. A better way to approach it is to ask them for their input on the different options and then make the decision that’s best for you based on what they tell you. Cleaning up There’s always a little bit of a mess when you get your nails done – think nail clippings, dust from filing, used cotton balls from removing polish. Worried that your nail tech is grossed out by all this and annoyed at having to pick up after you? They’re not. Not only that, but if you try to clean up, you might just get in the way. “It’s part of our job to keep up with the mess,” says Medrano. “And we know our way around our station best.” Remember, you can always give yourself a manicure at home, but if you go to the salon, one of the perks is not having to clean up! Do this instead: If you want to help, the best thing you can do is stay out of your nail tech’s way. As they try to wipe down their station, move your hands so they can do that. In other words, pay attention and adjust your positioning when needed – that will be the best way to help. Moving your own stuff to the drying station Your manicure is done, and it’s time to move over to the drying station. You feel bad about making a tech pick up your handbag, so you grab it yourself. While your intention is to be kind, you may smudge your nails and mess up all the hard work they just did. “We are here to help,” says Medrano, who confirms it’s better for them to help than to have you mess up your nails. Plus, even a little chip or smudge is a cardinal sin when it comes to making your manicure last longer. Do this instead: Allow them to move your bag (and any other items you have with you) to the drying station. Be gracious, and say thank you. Also let them pull out the chair or stool for you. Really don’t want someone to pick up your bag? Consider wearing a small crossbody bag so you can keep it on during your appointment. Holding it in Maybe you have to sneeze, or perhaps you are mid-manicure and suddenly have to pee. Holding it in does nobody any favours. While you may not want to interrupt the appointment, your nail tech would rather you be comfortable and enjoy the service. Plus, if you hold in your sneeze, it could backfire and lead to a bigger sneeze where you spray germs everywhere. “Do not be scared to ask if you need to do something,” says Medrano. “Nothing surprises us.” Do this instead: Need to use the bathroom? Let your tech know, and ask when the best time would be for you to do so. Have to sneeze? Say, “I’m going to sneeze.” Then, rather than using your hands to cover your mouth (which your tech then needs to go back to touching), sneeze into the crook of your arm. Trying to shimmy your credit card out of your wallet If the end of your appointment has come and you still haven’t paid, sliding your credit card out of your wallet with wet nails may feel like a Herculean task. But you can’t possibly ask your nail tech to do that, right? That would be rude. Wrong again. It’s actually ruder to smudge the beautiful paint job your nail tech just put a ton of time and energy into. Do this instead: “The amount of times that I have helped take out credit cards? It’s quite often,” says Medrano. “Just ask! Truly, it’s no problem.” Make it easier on your tech by telling them exactly where it is and what colour the card is; that way, they don’t have to fish around for it. Also, there’s no need to apologise – just say thank you! Image credits: Getty Images This article originally appeared on <a href="https://www.readersdigest.com.au/healthsmart/tips/10-polite-habits-nail-techs-actually-dislike-and-what-to-do-instead" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Reader's Digest</a>.

Beauty & Style

11 polite habits cruise workers actually dislike – and what to do instead

Onboard etiquette At hotels and all-inclusive resorts, workers come and go over the course of your stay. That’s not the case on cruises, where cruise ship employees will be sailing with you throughout the entire voyage. Because of that, you get to know your stateroom attendant, preferred bartender and favourite performer in a different way, and you might want to go out of your way to be friendly and polite to them. But while your motivations may be good, the etiquette rules at sea aren’t necessarily the same as the ones on land. Some habits you think are polite don’t go over quite the way you’d expect. They may even affect cruise worker’s pay rate and the opportunity for them to be offered a future contract, according to Alissa M., a performer who’s worked on some of the world’s top cruise lines, including Holland America, Princess and Norwegian. And other seemingly kind gestures may actually be awkward or get in the way of an employee doing his or her job. So, what do you need to know before you embark on a cruise? We got the inside scoop from cruise ship directors, chefs, servers, entertainers, stateroom attendants and other employees to find out the missteps they wish you’d avoid – and what you should do instead. These cruise tips will make sure it’s smooth sailing for everyone, every time. Raving about your special-request dinner It’s wonderful when you have such a delicious meal that you want to compliment the chef and tell everyone at your dinner table about it. However, when the item in question is a special request – especially one that required advance notice for preparation – the chef won’t be able to replicate it right away, which may upset other guests who want it. “The problem is not when they share it but when everyone loves the dish and then wants it now. A special request cannot be mass-produced,” explains one chef on a small luxury cruise line who prefers to remain anonymous. “The other concern is that many people in the kitchen are now making dozens of special requests, and they’re being pulled away from preparing dishes from the regular menu.” Do this instead: tell your dinner mates that your special-request dish was excellent after they’re finished with their meals. That way, you’ve complimented the chef, but you’ve also given him and other chefs in the galley ample time to recreate the dish for more passengers. Sharing positive feedback about entertainers to the cruise director or guest services Guests may think they’re doing entertainers a favour when they compliment their performances to other employees on the ship, but that message isn’t going to the right people. “A lot of people assume that the cruise director is the ‘boss’ of the entertainers, but rarely are they the ones making hiring decisions,” explains Alissa. “Because my agent and corporate personnel are shoreside, they don’t see what happens onboard.” Do this instead: complete the surveys at the end of your cruise, and turn them in or submit them online. “The official feedback surveys are the only way positive messages get back to the decision makers who actually decide my bookings, pay rate and more,” Alissa explains. “If a worker really stands out to you on your cruise in any department, please mention them by name in the guest post-cruise survey. Telling the cruise director or guest services will do very little to benefit that employee who went above and beyond.” Helping to bring in the boat after an excursion or expedition It takes a lot of effort to get that Zodiac or tender boat back to where it needs to be after an excursion, and if you can help, why wouldn’t you? Well, because it’s not actually as helpful as you think it is. “Some guests grab the poles to ‘help’ when they are approaching the platform and returning to the ship, but this causes the boat to jerk, or the boat must pull away again from the ship because they have unsteadied it,” explains one expedition team leader on a small ship about this etiquette mistake. “Guests can also injure themselves by pulling too hard and straining a muscle, or they can hurt their hands and fingers.” Another problem? Sometimes people stand up in the boat, which causes a danger to the group, since the driver can’t see properly. Do this instead: stay seated in the boat, and hold on tightly to the ropes until the boat is secured by the expedition team and crew on the ship. The team will tell you when it’s safe to get up and how to leave the boat. Leave the navigation to the experts to keep you and everyone else safe. Offering to buy an entertainer a drink during the show If you’re enjoying the performances of a singer, dancer or piano player on your ship, you might want to buy them a drink to say thank you during the show. However, that’s not the best way to express your gratitude. Plus, it might not even be allowed. “I worked for some cruise lines where our contracts explicitly stated we could not have alcohol onstage or drink close to showtime,” explains Alissa. “In some instances, this is a fireable offense.” Plus, it can be awkward. “We don’t want to be rude,” she adds, “but we also cannot break our contract rules.” Beyond that, beverages are expensive for cruise-ship guests – but workers can buy their drinks at cost. “I feel bad accepting a $17 to $20 drink from a guest that would cost me $1.25 in the crew bar,” Alissa explains. Do this instead: show your appreciation for a worker by tipping them or purchasing a piece of merchandise. And remember: while you’re on holiday, they’re working, and there are certain lines you shouldn’t cross. Asking personal questions to be friendly It’s easy to get cosy with cruise ship employees. After all, you’re all at sea together for an extended period of time, and it’s their job to make sure you’re happy and comfortable. Since they’re seeing you with your family or hearing about your adventures, it seems rude not to reciprocate and ask them about themselves. While that’s certainly true to a degree, the problem comes when you forget that this is a professional relationship, not a friendship. “Guests ask very personal questions,” says Steve M.*, who’s been a cruise director for more than 15 years. “I am an open book, and I always say, ‘If you are ready for the answer, I will tell you the truth.’ Then you tell the truth and they either take offense or try to change you.” Think: relationships (like, why they aren’t married or chose not to have kids), religion and politics. Just like at the Christmas dinner table, these conversations can get uncomfortable quickly. Do this instead: say hello and definitely be cordial, but limit your conversations to casual small talk. And before posing any personal questions, ask yourself this: How would you feel if the tables were turned—especially if you were being asked these questions at work? *Steve M. is a pseudonym. Going to your stateroom as soon as you board the ship While you might think it’s polite to get out of the way of other passengers during the boarding process by heading straight to your cabin, you’ll actually be in the way of employees if your stateroom isn’t ready. Sometimes, especially on smaller vessels, guests are permitted to board the ship before the rooms have been completely turned over and refreshed from the prior passengers. “If you arrive at your room too early, it slows down the process,” says Steve. “Plus, the crew then must be polite and become engaged with guests, which is not helpful.” And let’s not forget about your luggage, which takes a while to actually get to your room and won’t be there when you are! Do this instead: if you board early, wait until the ship’s personnel announce when the staterooms are ready. (Or board later for less of an issue – and to skip the boarding rush.) While you wait, have lunch at the buffet restaurant, check out the cruise ship’s hidden features or chill out by the pool. Just remember to pack your bathing suit in your carry-on so you have access to it right away! Stacking plates for your sever It seems like stacking the plates would make it easier for your server to pick up dirty dishes, but this can actually cause all sorts of problems. “It really messes up removing the plates, especially if the standard in the restaurant is not to stack plates but take them away one or two at a time,” explains one restaurant employee with a small cruise line. “And it actually makes it more difficult to clear and wash the plates for the dishwashers.” The latter is especially true when the passengers haven’t eaten everything on their plates. This causes an uneven stack, which makes it difficult for the server to carry the stack back to the dishwasher … who also has to deal with a huge mess, since the bottoms of the plates are now covered in goop from the plates above them. Do this instead: let the servers do their jobs. They have been trained in the ship’s preferred plate-removal method, and they’ll get those items to the back in the most efficient, least messy way possible. Tipping your server on the restaurant check If you’re dining at a specialty restaurant and you’ve had excellent service, you’ll want to leave a tip. But here’s what you probably don’t realise: “Passengers may think they are generously tipping a crew member by writing in a tip on the receipt, but it sadly doesn’t go to that crew member,” says one server with a large cruise line. “My understanding is that it goes into the ship’s account, and that’s how the ship pays for the ‘gratuities paid for’ incentives you see when you book your trip. It’s kind of distributed between all the crew … and maybe not even that.” Do this instead: “It is way better to tip a crew member directly with cash,” she says. “That way, you are sure that member got the tip you think they deserved – and that you really wanted them to have. [But] the crew are not allowed to tell passengers that.” Complimenting an entertainer's looks or appearance Sure, compliments can be lovely, but they can also be super awkward when they’re from someone you barely know. “A big thing that bothers me is when passengers comment on my looks or my body, thinking it’s polite and a compliment,” explains Madeline D., a production singer on some of the larger cruise ships. “One time I had a guest, who was a repeat cruiser, tell me I looked like I lost weight.” There are many things wrong with a statement like that, starting with the fact that it’s an assumption and an inherent judgement, not to mention a backhanded compliment. It also implies that the guest is staring at her body and looking at it in an inappropriate way. Depending on the situation, it could also border on flirting, which crosses a line too. Do this instead: save comments about appearances for friends and family – and honestly, maybe not even that. If you want to say something nice to a performer on the ship, tell them you enjoyed their performance that evening. Telling the piano player how much you're enjoying the song Cruise directors are also singers and entertainers, so they’re interacting with passengers in those roles as well while on board. According to Steve, some passengers love a performance so much that they want to tell the performer right away – even in the middle of said performance. “Guests will come to talk to you in the middle of a song to tell you how much they are enjoying your music, but then it’s sometimes difficult to remember where you were, and you can lose the song,” he says. “While it’s nice that people appreciate your talent, there are other ways of showing it.” Do this instead: wait until the performance is over so you don’t accidentally trip up the performer. You’ll enjoy the song more this way, anyway – and so will your fellow cruisers! Not letting the crew know when there's a problem You may not want to bother employees or say anything negative while on your cruise, but this is a mistake. The crew is there to make sure you have an incredible experience, and they really want to help you make the most of it. Plus, your unhappiness will eventually seep out. “Guests will say they love everything while on board, and then in their survey, they’ll nitpick about very small things, and by the end of the review, they are unhappy,” says Steve. Do this instead: if you’re not happy about something, let guest services know as soon as possible. And if you’re not happy with your meal, let the maître d’ know so they can bring you something more satisfactory. Remember: the ship’s staff and crew can’t fix something that they don’t know is wrong; let them know what’s going on, give them a chance to make it right and turn this into the best cruise you’ve ever taken. As mentioned earlier, the guest surveys are taken seriously – and used to determine staffing and pay rates – so it truly doesn’t help anyone when you’re complaining after the fact. Image credits: Getty Images This article originally appeared on <a href="https://www.readersdigest.com.au/travel/11-polite-habits-cruise-workers-actually-dislike-and-what-to-do-instead?pages=1" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Reader's Digest</a>.

Cruising

Readers respond: What did you like or dislike about where you grew up?

We asked our readers what their favourite and least favourite things were about growing up where they did, and the responses were overwhelming. From affluent suburbs and knowing your neighbours, to beachside homes and lasting memories, here's your favourite childhood memories from where you grew up. Denise Peck - That as kids we could walk the streets knowing virtually everyone in our immediate neighbourhood. Simpler times when kids were relatively safe to roam. Lynne Fairbrother - I lived across the road from the beach, loved the beach and was there most every day with my friends. Wasn't anything I didn't like about where I grew up. Denise Shearer - Growing up in a rich suburb where the kids went to private schools & I had to run the gauntlet to get to my bus stop. They waited for me & chucked rotten tomatoes & fruit at me until I changed the way I went to school. Judy Wiese - We lived in a poor area in a Housing Trust house, however, life was good. We didn’t know any better. I loved school, had good friends, Mum was a good sewer and made our clothes, we had plenty to eat and were happy playing outdoors. Vicky Johnson - I grew up with many friends in the same street. Christine Dyson - Loved growing up in Eltham in the 50’s and 60’s so country then creeks, mines, cubby huts built out of sticks in the bush, scooters, two wheelers, neighbourhood friends and the ultimate 6pm curfew. Lyn Bradford - Best day of childhood was when I finally got to leave & put it all behind me. Christine Whyte - Loved where I grew up, nice quiet streets back then, had great fun playing with all the kids in the street of whom I have remained friends with for over 60 years and the safeness of walking to school rain, hail or shine. Peter Spicer - Loved where I grew up. Real rough neighbourhood but full of diamonds. Margaret Frances Magurean - Loved the community of our little block of tract houses back in the 1950's. Lots of kids and everybody's mum and dad watched out for us all. Great way to grow up. Elaine Stewart - It was like a big family where we all knew one another and life was so wonderful and uncomplicated. There was a war going on and our dads were away for years but it didn't really affect our way of life as children. Ruth Hunter - Loved living next to school oval in secondary school, could leave home when first bell rang. Alison Angel - My two years in Gibraltar were my best childhood years. Weekends spent on endless, deserted Spanish beaches before tourism began in earnest. And Spanish food. Julie McGregor - I grew up in a small town in the wheat belt area of northern Victoria. I had a delightful childhood, swimming in the river going to the lakes with family and friends. Playing sports and local town celebrations. Going to school with friends I’d known all my life. So blessed I knew everyone in the town. Free and simple. Michael Lawrence - I grew up where l grew up. I had no reason to like or dislike it. Denise McGoldrick - Nothing. Life was a lot simpler back then. We only watched about an hour of TV after we did our chores and were in bed by 7.30pm. Was allowed to stay up later on weekends when I turned 14 to watch the Johnny Cash Show. Great Thrill. Image credits: Getty Images

Travel Tips

Chills and thrills: why some people love music – and others don’t

Think of your favourite piece of music. Do you get shivers when the music swells or the chorus kicks in? Or are the opening few bars enough to make you feel tingly? Despite having no obvious survival value, listening to music can be a highly rewarding activity. It’s one of the most pleasurable activities with which people engage. But in a <a href="http://dx.doi.org/10.1016/j.cub.2014.01.068">study published</a> in Current Biology, Spanish and Canadian researchers report on a group of “music anhedonics” – literally, those who do not enjoy music. This is an intriguing phenomenon, and we presume very rare. Importantly, these people are not “<a href="http://www.karger.com/Article/FullText/206851">amusic</a>” – an affliction that often results from acquired or congenital damage to parts of the brain required to perceive or interpret music. In this study, the “music anhedonics” perceive music in the same way as the rest of the population. Nor are they people who generally don’t enjoy pleasure – they are not depressed, nor highly inhibited, and they are just as sensitive as other people to other types of non-musical rewards (such as food, money, sex, exercise and drugs). They simply don’t experience chills or similar responses to pleasurable music in the way that other people do. They’re just not that into music. <h2>I’ve got chills – they’re multiplying</h2> When we listen to pleasurable music, the “<a href="http://www.psychologytoday.com/basics/dopamine">pleasure chemical</a>” dopamine is <a href="http://www.sciencemag.org/content/340/6129/216.short">released in the striatum</a>, a key part of the <a href="http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1196/annals.1390.002/abstract?deniedAccessCustomisedMessage=&userIsAuthenticated=false">brain’s reward system</a>. Importantly, music activates the striatum just like other rewarding stimuli, such as food and sex. During anticipation of the peak – or “<a href="http://www.nature.com/nature/journal/v506/n7489/full/506433a.html">hotspot</a>” as music psychologist <a href="http://slobodajohn.wix.com/johns">John Sloboda</a> calls it – in the music, dopamine is released in the dorsal (or upper) striatum. During the peak, when we experience chills and other signs that our body’s <a href="http://psychology.about.com/od/aindex/g/autonomic-nervous-system.htm">autonomic nervous system</a> – responsible for regulating involuntary body functions – is being aroused, dopamine is released in the nearby ventral striatum. So what’s going on in the brains of music anhedonics? The authors offer a neurobiological explanation. While many types of pleasurable stimuli activate the same broad reward circuit in the brain, there are some differences depending on the type of stimulus. It is possible that the pattern of brain regions specifically activated by music pleasure, including the connection from auditory regions which perceive music to the reward centres, are slightly different in these individuals than in other people. This isn’t unusual as we know that there can be enormous differences in how rewarding (and potentially addictive) other rewards such as food, sex, money and drugs can be to different individuals, but it is rare to get no pleasurable response to these rewards. Is the story more complex then? <h2>Bittersweet symphony</h2> Music is a complex phenomenon – it affects us in multiple ways, and is used for many purposes. While pleasure is a popular reason for music listening, we are also drawn to music for other reasons. Sometimes the music isn’t pleasant at all. Our attraction, our need, and sometimes perhaps dependence on sad, angry or even frightening music flies in the face of evolutionary theory – why seek out something emotionally negative? Insight into our uses of music is however being achieved via music psychology – a rapidly expanding field which draws on research across numerous domains including cognitive neuroscience, social psychology and <a href="http://link.springer.com/book/10.1007%2F11573548">affective computing</a> (the science of human-computer interaction where the device can detect and respond to its user’s emotions). In a <a href="http://ukcatalogue.oup.com/product/9780199695225.do">study</a> involving more than 1,000 people, Swedish music psychologist <a href="http://www.oru.se/Intern/Organisation/Institutioner/Musik/Konferenser/CV/Alf%20Gabrielsson.pdf">Alf Gabrielsson</a> showed that only a little over half of strong experiences with music involve positive emotions. Many involved “mixed emotions” (think nostalgic or bittersweet love songs), and about one in ten involve negative emotions. <h2>‘Non-positive’ can be good</h2> We listen to music that makes us feel like this for many reasons. We can use it to help express how we’re feeling – sometimes this might make the problem worse (such as when we use music to ruminate), but other times it helps to give voice to an emotion we otherwise could not communicate. As a result, we may feel more emotionally aware or stable afterwards. We also use music to solve problems, to look at our situation in a different light, to energise us or to relax us, and often to avoid or distract us – all well-known strategies for managing or regulating emotions. Music can also help us connect to others. Even if we don’t get a buzz from the music normally, when we listen with others, the enhanced social connectivity can be highly satisfying. A <a href="http://pom.sagepub.com/content/early/2012/05/01/0305735612440615">2012 study</a> showed that individuals who listened to music with close friends or their partners showed significantly stronger autonomic responses than those who listened alone. We might better empathise with the emotional or mental states of others, and at times, music feels like a “virtual friend”, providing solace and comfort when needed, and perhaps even stimulating release of the stress reducing and affiliation hormone <a href="http://www.psychologytoday.com/basics/oxytocin">oxytocin</a>. All these uses of music can be beneficial for our “<a href="http://www.academia.edu/3179324/Eudaimonic_Well-Being_as_a_Core_Concept_of_Positive_Functioning">eudaimonic well-being</a>”; in other words, for enhancing our engagement and purpose in life, rather than just our pleasure. They also involve a distributed set of connected brain regions other than just the reward circuit. This means that these positive effects of music may be preserved even when the typical pleasure response is not experienced. Another feature of music that distinguishes it from many other rewarding stimuli is that it is an artform. And as an artform, it can be appreciated aesthetically, in an intellectual or analytical – rather than emotional – manner. We can listen to a piece oozing with tragedy such as Albinoni’s Adagio in G minor or Trent Reznor’s Hurt – listen below – but feel awe and beauty in the sophisticated score of the composer and perfect execution of the performers. This might explain why some of the music anhedonics in this study still reported feeling some pleasure to music, even when their bodies weren’t along for the ride. Reward circuitry is also activated by aesthetically beautiful stimuli, but other frontal brain regions involved in aesthetic judgment are also activated. It may be possible then for music anhedonics to still appreciate and enjoy music, even if their reward brain circuitry differs a little from those of us who can experience intense physical responses to music. And of course, music anhedonics might still find music a useful way to express or regulate their own emotions, and to connect to others. Or are music anhedonics also music “aneudaimonics”? In fact, we know so little about this fascinating, previously “hidden” phenomenon that this study opens the door for so many more studies – which is rewarding all of itself. Image credits: Getty Images This article was originally published on <a href="https://theconversation.com/chills-and-thrills-why-some-people-love-music-and-others-dont-24007" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Conversation</a>.

Music

"I really dislike you": Ally Langdon fires up on Karl over hot chillies

Ally Langdon certainly got herself into a pickle when she ate one of the world’s hottest chillies live on air during Monday morning’s episode of Today. While she and her co-host Karl Stefanovic chatted to chef Jarrod Moore, organiser of the Melbourne chilli eating championship, and Greg Barlow, the 2021 chilli eating champ, Ally tore into a Habenaro pepper. <img style="width: 500px; height: 281.25px;" src="https://oversixtydev.blob.core.windows.net/media/7840400/daily-2.jpg" alt="" data-udi="umb://media/94364a3d12ba4f6aa05fd81882027f7d" /> Despite being hesitant, she didn’t pass up on the opportunity – especially after Jarrod said Greg managed to eat 18 Carolina Reapers (the world's hottest chilli). "I really dislike you," she said, turning to Karl, after her face screwed up in regret. "Is it a slow build?" she then asked Jarrod who confirmed it was as most of the heat is in the seeds, which she hadn’t completely gotten into. "You haven't even got the seeds yet," Karl said. Ally took another big bite, which left entertainment Brooke Boney shocked. "Oh, Ally!" she said. "What are you doing?" <img style="width: 0px; height: 0px;" src="https://oversixtydev.blob.core.windows.net/media/7840401/daily-1.jpg" alt="" data-udi="umb://media/baed1daea89b4eca84183237d13b476b" /> Ally put the pepper down slowly, saying: "OK. Now I'm feeling it.” "Do you know what I am worried about? How we are going to get you to the toilet..." Karl said. Ally suggested Karl could carry her, which he swiftly refused. "Really regretting that second bite," Ally said in pain. "I can't stand you Karl. "This is horrible...it keeps getting worse!” Ally returned to Today in early March, due to a brutal injury that left her on bed rest for weeks.

Food & Wine

Grant Denyer on meeting wife Chezzi: “It was dislike at first sight”

Nominated for a Gold Logie this year for his hosting role on Family Feud, the one person Grant Denyer will be thanking if he is victorious at winning the gold statue is his wife Cheryl “Chezzi” Denyer. “My wife is a massive part of my career and it’s a great night for her to join me, so we can celebrate it together,” Grant told <a href="https://www.nowtolove.com.au/lifestyle/career/grant-denyer-gold-logie-49287">Now To Love</a>. “I would not have gotten here without her. She’s incredibly strong, creative and supportive, and she’s built my career with me,” the TV host added. “It’s a great night for us to spend together and reward her for all the work she’s put in.” However, the couple – who first met when they worked together at Sunrise in 2005 and married in 2010 – weren’t always such a tight-knit unit. In fact, when they first met each other it was more dislike at first sight. “To be honest, we didn’t really like each other at the start. I think we were really similar and we had really similar fears so therefore we actually clashed,” Grant revealed. “She was quite pushy in terms of how she thought I should do things and then I was a smart alec know-it-all who thought I knew better,” the radio host added. “There was a tug-of-war situation that went on for quite a while until one day, I brushed her hand accidentally and then I just felt this tingle from the top of my head to my toes just come over me.” The 40-year-old continued, “And it was from that exact moment that I realised, ‘Oh my God, I can’t live without this woman! I need her in my life forever!’ and it was instant from that moment on. That was the moment and I still remember it to this day.” <blockquote style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 658px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" class="instagram-media"> <div style="padding: 8px;"> <div style="background: #F8F8F8; line-height: 0; margin-top: 40px; padding: 62.5% 0; text-align: center; width: 100%;"> <div style="background: url(data:image/png; base64,ivborw0kggoaaaansuheugaaacwaaaascamaaaapwqozaaaabgdbtueaalgpc/xhbqaaaafzukdcak7ohokaaaamuexurczmzpf399fx1+bm5mzy9amaaadisurbvdjlvzxbesmgces5/p8/t9furvcrmu73jwlzosgsiizurcjo/ad+eqjjb4hv8bft+idpqocx1wjosbfhh2xssxeiyn3uli/6mnree07uiwjev8ueowds88ly97kqytlijkktuybbruayvh5wohixmpi5we58ek028czwyuqdlkpg1bkb4nnm+veanfhqn1k4+gpt6ugqcvu2h2ovuif/gwufyy8owepdyzsa3avcqpvovvzzz2vtnn2wu8qzvjddeto90gsy9mvlqtgysy231mxry6i2ggqjrty0l8fxcxfcbbhwrsyyaaaaaelftksuqmcc); display: block; height: 44px; margin: 0 auto -44px; position: relative; top: -22px; width: 44px;"></div> </div> <a style="color: #000; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none; word-wrap: break-word;" href="https://www.instagram.com/p/BiJi_80A9wu/" target="_blank">All day. Sunday.</a> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">A post shared by <a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px;" href="https://www.instagram.com/chezzidenyer/" target="_blank"> ｃｈｅｚｚｉｄｅｎｙｅｒ</a> (@chezzidenyer) on Apr 29, 2018 at 2:22am PDT </div> </blockquote> The happily married couple, who live on a farm near Bathurst in NSW, are the proud parents of two gorgeous girls, Sailor 7, and Scout, 2 – and becoming a father is one of Grant's proudest achievements. “They’re very funny, cheeky and very compassionate, and they’ve got that right amount of spunk about them,” a chuffed Grant shared. “I’m totally besotted by them and in love!”

Don’t fall for Facebook “dislike” button scam

Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg recently announced that a dislike button was coming, which is true. But a new scam claiming early access to the feature is not true. Tech website HackRead warns people not to click on any headlines that claim to “Get newly introduced Facebook dislike button on your profile.” Do not click on it! If you do, scammers will be able to share links on your timeline and with your Facebook friends. And the worst-case scenario? You might accidentally install viruses or malware onto your computer by clicking on the link. When Facebook released the dislike button, you’ll hear it directly from Facebook.

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