4 ways to cope with a messy loved one
Household chores are often a battleground between “messy” types and “clean” types – which, if you fall in either categories, you probably already know. It can be a big source of discord among couples but it’s not just marriages – sharing a house with anyone be it a friend, sibling or child who has a different philosophy to you can be challenging and stressful. Here’s four ways you can alleviate some of the conflict.
Be patient
Realise that the person’s tendencies is a product of their upbringing, history and habit (not a deliberate attempt to annoy you, hopefully). It may be that the person prioritises cleanliness and organisation in a different way and therefore habits will take time to change. So don’t give into the frustration and be understanding if the person is trying to change.
Make a to-do list
Jot down the list of chores that need to be done – every day, week and month. Have a discussion and mutually allocate the responsibilities fairly. A lot of domestic duty conflict is down to not having worked out a clear division of labour so dividing it fairly will prevent anyone harbouring resentment.
Designate an area
Give the messy person in your life an agreed upon area to be their messy space. By creating common spaces and personal spaces (which the person is responsible for), this can eliminate much of the tension as the area is not yours to concern yourself with. Be okay with this area not being completely clean or clutter-free.
Talk about it
Talking through the differences is key to ensuring you are on the same page. Make sure you don’t initiate discussion on the fly but set time aside so you both can find some long-term solutions. Outline what is considered messy and clean to each of you. Explain the reasons why a clean space is important to you and be open to understanding their point of view too.
Related links:
4 ways to keep your house cleaner for longer
6 organising shortcuts for the home
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