How to tell people about your divorce
While it may not be the most pleasant topic of conversation, if you’re in the midst of a separation or divorce you’ll eventually have to tell your nearest and dearest (and some relative strangers) that you are no longer part of a couple. There’s a strong chance that many of us would rather have a tooth pulled than sit down with friends and family and announce that our marriage has ended but putting off the inevitable never ends well. A lack of transparency can make it difficult to move forward while also placing you in the uncomfortable position of having to tell people at an awkward moment down the track when you may have been divorced for months but the news comes as a complete shock to them as they’re hearing it for the first time. Having a strategy for approaching conversations can be helpful, here’s what the experts recommend.
1. Tell your close friends first
There’s a strong possibility they are abreast of the situation already, at least to some extent. Sharing the official news however allows you to start the grieving process and move slowly towards closure. Your closest friends are the ones most likely to be there for you as your life changes and it’s important to let them in and lean on their support.
2. Share with your family
It can be difficult to share with your loved ones that a relationship they may have been part of for years has ended. Telling your children should be of utmost importance. Whether you do that individually or as a group is completely up to you but having an honest conversation and allowing both you and them to grieve is essential.
3. Work
While it’s not always necessary to share the minutia of your life with your workplace, you may need to fill your immediate manager in on what’s happened. Likewise, if you work within a very close knit team or are especially friendly with people at work you may want to let them know.
4. Extended family
Unless you want to subject yourself to a plethora of phone calls, an email may be best for your extended family. Keep them in the loop and let them know what’s happened so that they can offer support but don’t exhaust yourself with feeling as if you need to explain the situation to every single person in your life.
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